#and if she left him I think that would make his favoritism of katniss all the more interesting (and creepy)

[stormtide-leviathan]

Has anyone written an AU where Snow stuck around in district 12 as a peacekeeper instead of returning to the capital and was there in Katniss’s time?

[nebulablakemurphy]

Moves & Countermoves (Part 9)

Summary: No one ever wins the games, even fourteen years later, Y/N is still playing. Warning: this chapter contains heavy subject matter and a steamy making out sess, proceed with caution.

Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8

“Effie and I wrote these speeches together.” Y/N assures Katniss and Peeta as Effie doles them out. “Don’t be nervous, nothing crazy.”

Katniss nods.

“Just a few words for the fallen tributes of the district. For eleven that is Thresh and Rue,” Effie says, hoping to put their minds at ease.

At present, they are crammed into one vehicle, transporting them to the justice building. Arista is sat between Katniss and Peeta, a doll in hand. Peeta allows the doll to walk along his leg, occasionally dropping it to one side or the other; causing the little girl to giggle. She shouldn’t be here.

People of the Capitol have sent them gifts from the moment they were born, things much too lavish for district twelve. Such items are sold to peacekeepers and the money funnels back through twelve. Keeping them afloat. Very few offerings they keep, like the doll. A tablet for Everest, just like his mother’s. He taps away at it, almost as if he’s playing a game.

“Can I see?” Katniss asks.

The boy nods, holding it across the isle. It’s an agenda…no, a journal. She realizes. ‘Day one, district eleven. Agriculture. The train is five hours from home.’

Katniss blinks rapidly at the screen before handing it back. He shouldn’t be here. “Thought you were playing a game.”

“I have games.” Everest tells her, “you can pick one to play.”

“Show me your favorite.” Don’t worry about all of this. You’re just a kid.

He smiles. “I like this one. You have to dodge the logs and get the dot from one side to the other.”

“I won’t be very good.” Katniss confesses as he hands it back to her.

“It’s for fun, Katniss.” The boy shrugs, “you don’t have to be good.”

Y/N passes an affectionate hand over her son’s hair.

“When I married Haymitch, there was an understanding. Whatever we had to do to stay alive, we would do. But between him and I was also an understanding; that he loved me and that love is unconditional. He wouldn’t leave me if I was scared, he would be patient. He would wait for me. When there were time restrictions, if we couldn’t wait, he would get me through. I think Peeta could be that person for you, Katniss.”

“You think I should marry Peeta?”

“I think you should be his friend.” Y/N corrects her. “All of this pretending to be in love stuff will come easier, I promise. Do it on your terms, take your time.” While you still have time.

Katniss takes this into consideration. She doesn’t dislike the idea of being with Peeta. But the idea of being with anyone seems impossible to her now. Even out of the arena she no longer feels safe…maybe if they make it back home. After they’ve convinced Snow and the districts. Even then, she doesn’t think she can love anyone the way Y/N loves Haymitch; or be loved the way Haymitch loves her.

What Y/N doesn’t tell her is that their toasting, the one Haymitch asked for when she was ready, did not come until two years after their Capitol wedding. After they’d celebrated two ‘anniversaries’ and Everest’s first birthday. She doesn’t tell her how verbalizing ‘I love you’ is painful for Haymitch… how he cried after telling her for the first time. Because he lost every other person he’s ever loved. How his tears broke her heart, how much they still do.

The vehicle comes to a harsh stop before the engine cuts out.

“Crash landing,” Haymitch remarks.

They are ushered out in a single file line. Y/N, Haymitch and the children are left in the viewing room with Effie and Cinna to watch Katniss and Peeta on stage from the projector.

Nothing can go wrong. Katniss repeats the mantra over and over. Nothing can go wrong.

Peeta does most of the talking, he offered and she couldn’t say no.

Arista pays little attention to what’s happening, too preoccupied with chatting up one of the peacekeepers who is trying to keep a hard exterior.

Everest is slightly more involved, watching the adults around him; gauging their reactions. His mother is anxious, twisting her fingers around the fabric at the back of his father’s jacket.

Cinna catches him staring and smiles. “Can you see?”

Everest nods as all eyes fall on him.

Y/N whispers something to her husband that the little boy can’t make out. Haymitch reaches a hand back then, bringing his son up beside Effie.

The peacekeeper sends Arista back to her parents with a gift. “I got candy.”

“What kind of candy?” Y/N leans down.

“From him,” the girl tells her mother, pointing toward the man in the white suit.

“Did you thank him?”

“Mhm.”

“Good,” Y/N boops her little nose. “This is actually one of my favorites, do you think we could trade?”

“Well, what do you have?” Arista arches a brow.

Y/N surrenders her shoulder bag. “Anything you want.”

Arista’s eyes light up, “really?”

“Mhm.”

“Thank you, Mommy. Here’s your candy.”

“Thank you.” Y/N accepts the tiny wrapped object. Sliding it into her pocket.

“Both Rue and Thresh were so young. But our lives are not measured in minutes, they’re measured by the lives of those we touch around us. For myself, and for Katniss; we know that without Thresh and without Rue we wouldn’t be standing here today.” Peeta speaks from his heart.

Though their speeches were approved by both mentors and their Capitol escort, they do not have the intended effect. A whistle is heard, three fingers in the air, the nearest peacekeepers drawing batons.

“Get the kids away from the door.” Haymitch bites out.

“What about Katniss and Peeta?” They’re still out there.

“I’ve got them,” he promises.

The audience grows to a distraught holler.

“What’s happening?” Everest turns to his mother.

“Come with me,” Y/N tries to keep calm as she takes his hand, moving quickly towards her daughter. Her bag all but forgotten.

“Mommy, why are they doing that?” Arista asks, seeing the older man being forced up onto the stage by peacekeepers.

“Shh,” Y/N turns her away. Hurrying both children up the stairs.

Hearing Katniss protest from the lower level, “no, please leave him alone.” The doors open and she is removed from the stage.

Y/N sits her babies down on the floor, “cover your ears.” They do as they’re told, looking to their mother for comfort. She kneels, keeping them distracted as best she can; from the screams, from the gun shot, from the cruel world whirling around them.

Haymitch carries Katniss, kicking and screaming, toward the stairs. “What did I do?”

“Shhh,” he hushes her as Peeta follows.

“No, Haymitch! What did I do wrong?”

“Shut up. Get in here.” He closes the door behind them.

“I did everything I was supposed to do.” Katniss says, tears flooding her face.

“Katniss,” Peeta runs his knuckles along her arm; hoping to soothe her.

She steals Peeta’s hand, latching on for comfort. “Just help us get through this trip.”

“This trip?” Haymitch snaps two fingers in front of her, “wake up, girl. This trip doesn’t end when you get home. You never get off this train.”

Katniss’ heart sinks at the realization. They’re still stuck on this train.

“You two are mentors now, which means every year they’re gonna drag you out and broadcast the details of your romance. Your personal life becomes theirs. From now on, your job is to be a distraction so that people forget what the real problems are.”

Peeta’s free hand balls into a fist at his side. “So what do we do?”

“You’re gonna smile, continue reading the cards that Effie gives you and you’re gonna live happily ever after. Think you can do that?” His eyes flicker between the pair.

Peeta nods. Katniss follows reluctantly, after Haymitch pats her cheek. Just like he did before she stepped onto the hovercraft for the games.

“Good,” Haymitch says, with a sad smile. “Come here.”

Still in a state of shock, Katniss steps into his arms, resting her head against his shoulder. She watches through the window as the man from eleven’s lifeless body is removed.

“You’re gonna be ok, I promise.”

Katniss knows that her mentors will protect her…and Peeta. Anything she does is a collective loss or gain. Anything she does.

————————————————————————

Y/N manages to get through dinner on the train, choking down her meal after consoling Katniss, who refuses to leave her room. Peeta stays with her, opting for in room dining tonight.

Effie isn’t thrilled, but she understands and the younger children keep her plenty entertained.

Y/N and Haymitch break off before it gets late, tucking Everest and Arista into bed. Then Haymitch wanders down to the bar car, returning with a bottle. Seeing mayhem on the monitors of the control room as he passes.

“How the hell are we gonna fix this, Haymitch?” Y/N demands, the second he returns.

He uncorks the liquor, chugging a bit to get through this round of questioning. “There are ten other districts before the Capitol, they still have a chance to calm things down.”

She nods, swiping at traitorous tears. “How bad is it?”

Riots in the streets. “If all else fails, we have the show with Caesar before Snow’s party.” Setting the bottle aside, he pulls her in, “we’ll fix it.”

Y/N melts into him.

Haymitch tips her chin up. She is beautiful…and broken. Glossy eyes soften at the sight of him, lips parted and flushed from tears. “I love you.” The words claw their way from his throat; more painful to keep in than let out.

She kisses him then. Hot and hard, a little sloppy.

Haymitch cups the base of her neck, surrendering to the unrelenting force that is Y/N. The push and pull of her, the need for her.

Falling onto the mattress, lost in the heat of it. Something drops from Y/N’s dress as it’s discarded. The candy.

“You saving this for later?” Haymitch chuckles, holding it between them.

“Traded Arista for it.” Y/N admits, tossing the candy aside. “She got it off a peacekeeper. I’m sure it’s fine but…”

“Can’t risk it,” Haymitch agrees.

“Didn’t want to make a scene either, Everest is watching like a hawk.” She rolls off of him, onto her back.

“These kids,” Haymitch sighs. A gentle hand finds her bump, tracing patterns over the skin there.

————————————————————————

“We want to share with you the sorrows of your losses.” Katniss reads directly from the cards. In districts nine and ten, the crowd was calm. Now in district eight, two members of the crowd raise three fingers into the air. “The tributes of this district-” she breaks off as peacekeepers remove them from the scene; looking to Haymitch and Y/N.

They are no longer left in the viewing room, able to jump in and corral their victors if need be. Showing face to the masses to help calm them. Katniss wonders what kind of deals they had to make to be standing here with them.

Haymitch nods, encouraging her to continue. Y/N follows suit when Peeta’s eyes fall to her, jaw clenched. This is what we have to do. This is what they make us do.

Katniss picks up where she left off. “Were brave and noble warriors, who brought honor to their families and pride to their people. We are all of us united, both victors and vanquished, in serving a common purpose. The power and glory of the Capitol. Panem today, Panem tomorrow, Panem forever.”

People from districts three through seven are outraged with this speech, this falsehood, this injustice to the girl they saw in the arena. The Capitol won’t eat your soul, that is a fate much too kind for a victor. They break your connections, they make you theirs.

Districts one and two are more easily swayed, buying into the notion that the games are something to celebrate. The little girl who presents Katniss with flowers tells her that she wants to volunteer; just like she did.

The nightmares come and Peeta stays with Katniss most nights, helping each other survive.

Everest and Arista find ways to occupy themselves. Madge steps in when their parents have to tend the crushing weight of their titles. Tomorrow ends in the Capitol; Caesar and Snow, all in one night.

Y/N sits, legs crossed, beside Haymitch on the gray satin bench of the train car. Katniss and Peeta directly across from them.

“Snow is watching us.” Haymitch says, as if anyone could forget. “If he wants you to pacify the districts, I promise you, he’s not happy. Instead of being in love, you two sound like you’re reciting from a drilling manual.”

“I’m open to suggestions.” Peeta turns his palms up, they’re all grasping at straws now.

Y/N leans forward, “I think-”

“We could get married.” Katniss meets her gaze when she says it.

“That’s not helping,” Haymitch taps a finger against his glass.

Peeta’s eyes never leave Katniss. Of all the times he’s thought about it, wanted it even; someday in the future, when it was real. Not like this, never like this.

“I’m serious.” Katniss decides, “if we’re on this train forever it’s gonna happen eventually, why not now?”

“It does make a statement,” Haymitch huffs a laugh, “I’ll give you that.”

“Yeah, sure.” Peeta rises to his feet, “let’s do it.”

“Wait.” Y/N reaches out a hand to catch him, “we still have the show. We can find another way, something else to feed these people and keep them at bay for a while.”

“Like what?” Peeta plops back down in his seat.

“Like a baby.” Y/N forces the poofy skirt of her dress to lie flat against her bump.

“No, if you’re giving them that, we’re giving them the proposal.” Peeta protests. Y/N and Haymitch have already given away too much.

Katniss nods in agreement.

“Alright then,” Haymitch drinks to that, “let’s give them a night they’ll never forget.”

Part 10

Series Taglist: @praline357 @flowercrowns-goodvibes @justheretoparty420 @avocadotoastwithegg @officialjellydoughnut @whoreforfictionalpeople @treehouse-mouse @emo-markie @spilled-mi1k @magical-spit @greaser9902 @jessicamellarky @yourebuckingkiddingme @smuha2004 @sendhelplease @ninimackbrews @wittiestrain184 @r1dd1kulus @erenluvr69

[kait-bait8]

The thing I love the most about the Hunger Games is Katniss’ character arc.

Katniss Everdeen in book 1 is like Harry Potter in book 7. That is to say, the Katniss we follow in THG is the strong and resilient fighter. She is brave and selfless and tough and she digs deep despite tremendous pain. She has already overcome the loss of her father and the dire circumstances of her youth. And the 74th Hunger Games should have been her boss fight.

The end of THG shows us a Katniss who is a champion, a winner, a Victor. It feels like we are at the triumphant end of a story. Until she is told that the Capitol is not happy.

In Catching Fire we learn about Katniss’ nightmares. We learn that she sometimes can’t look at Prim without seeing Rue. We see her relationships begin to strain and change.

Katniss finding out that she will be going back into the games is one of my all time favorite scenes. Because in THG Katniss is in Survival Mode from the second she steps onto the platform. She holds back her tears and tries to look indifferent for the sponsors. But in CF she shatters. She flees. She cries and drinks and screams. She isn’t strong or resilient or even a little brave. And you just don’t see heroes react like that in other stories. But you can’t tell me it’s possible to read that scene and not feel your own stomach twist at the thought of that reality.

When Peeta hits the barrier and his heart stops Katniss loses it. It’s clear she knows about CPR from watching her mother, the same way she knew about blood poisoning and tourniquets in the last games, but it doesn’t even occur to her until after Finnick starts kissing Peeta. She isn’t sharp and quick and able to think on her feet. She is desperate to keep Peeta and the rebellion alive and that is it. People say that the victors keep Peeta alive because “if they didn’t Katniss would kill everyone and then herself” but Katniss knew her fate. She knew she wasn’t going to survive the arena. And she knew a life without Peeta was pointless. She would have “stopped living” like her mother.

When Katniss is rescued and Peeta is not, there was no “what is the plan? How are we going to get Peeta back? How are we going to save him?” There was only enough energy and emotion to try to claw Haymitch’s eyes out.

And then we get to Mockingjay. I’ve heard people complain that they couldn’t get through the book because it was just Katniss sleeping all the time. But of course she is sleeping all the time. Of course she can hardly qualify to be a soldier. Of course she finds solace in Finnick and his rope tying.

She doesn’t assassinate President Snow on her rogue mission. She gets her friends killed. She can’t even save Prim. Katniss gets knocked out and wakes up with the War already won. She secures the safety of Panem for a time by killing Coin but even that is the act of someone who no longer cares for her own safety and well-being.

I’m not saying she doesn’t do anything, she does an incredible amount for her mental/emotional state. But she isn’t Strong or Brave or Resilient. She doesn’t dig deep because even if she did there wouldn’t be anything left. She is completely broken.

That is what makes her epilogue so beautiful. Because at the end of her story she isn’t a Victor. She isn’t The Hero. She just, learns to be okay. She falls in love and finds peace and happiness and safety. I don’t know if I would say that she ever becomes unbroken but she picks up the pieces she can salvage and does her best with them.

Katniss Everdeen’s character arc is not one of Strength. There are many strong characters. It is a study of weakness and the beauty and love and community that comes from weakness.

[mollywog]

Do you think Caesar asked the other tributes about their dating life? Sorry, I know this is such a silly question 😅 I know that for Rue obviously that wasn’t the case because she was just a kid. Maybe neither for Thresh because he wasn’t playing along and just wanted to get the whole interview over with. We know for sure he didn’t ask Katniss about any special boy back home, so I wonder how he decided who to ask this personal question. Re-reading this bit, I noticed that he probably just brings out the most interesting thing about the tributes and goes from there. After all, Katniss did mention he made them all shine. For instance, with her he asked about Prim and also about her high training score which were definitely more important than asking about a boyfriend.

Katniss also mentioned that every tribute played an angle, since Peeta came across as really charming, probably he saw an opening to inquire about his love life? 😂 I guess I just keep thinking about how Peeta would confess his crush if Caesar didn’t ask about a potential girlfriend because there was no way of knowing he would, was there? I wonder what was the plan especially since their time was so limited being only 3 minutes. Of course, all of this is plot driven, so I know that Peeta was asked this question so that he could reveal he had a crush on Katniss. But I think it’s interesting to consider what would have happened if Caesar hadn’t given him the chance to admit to it.

Hey nonny!

Thanks for the ask! Not silly at all; It’s a fair question. It does feels like they left a fair amount left up to chance.

Some thoughts…

I think your right: Peeta came across as charming and Caesar was feeding off of that to ‘make him shine’ - Maybe there are Capitol Citizens out there that would want to help this boy get home to his sweetheart?

Caesar has been doing this for a while and is likely pretty predictable (especially to someone like Haymitch who’s a strategist and has been sitting through interviews for 20+ years)

I think about Cinna’s directions in Catching Fire and imagine Haymitch concluded interview prep with similar advice to Peeta the year prior.

“You’re ravishing,” he says. “Now, Katniss, because this bodice is so fitted, I don’t want you raising your arms above your head. Well, not until you twirl, anyway.”

“Will I be twirling again?” I ask, thinking of my dress last year.

“I’m sure Caesar will ask you. And if he doesn’t, you suggest it yourself. Only not right away. Save it for your big finale,” Cinna instructs me.

My favorite part about Peeta’s declaration is, he doesn’t respond with an affirmative right away.

Peeta hesitates, then gives an unconvincing shake of his head.

doesn’t that answer leave you so much more intrigued than him saying it right away?!? Peeta knows how to work the audience and uses it to get the biggest response.

[katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Since you're on a 9000 RPM answer kick right now, I'm so curious...

Peeta, knowing that Katniss was married, showed up to the race with parts for Katniss' car.

Was he hoping she was divorced? (Possibly having heard her name announced at the track as 'Everdeen'?) Or was my mans just so unbelievably still thirsting over her that he was willing to risk it all?

This is a question I prefer to answer with a few scenes from Peeta's pov rather than trying to explain it. Hope you enjoy!

<3 kdnfb

“You’re shitting me, right?” Peeta asks and glances to his left, pushing his body closer to the wall and the pay phone he’s using so an old man can get past him to the bathroom.

“I wouldn’t shit you. You’re my favorite turd,” Levi retorts. Peeta would laugh at the joke, since he walked right into it, if what his brother just told him weren’t so fucking ridiculous. “It’s the best we could do. Mom and I don’t have time to sit around Capitol, waiting on a bus, and I’m not asking Leah to do it. She’s got enough on her plate with the kids. This was the best we could do.”

“I get that,” Peeta says and shifts his frame again as yet another person excuses themselves to get by him. This pay phone is horribly placed, he thinks with a frown. “It’s just… really?”

“Think of it like you parked it at the bus station and just left it there… without stealing it.”

“Does it at least have gas in it?”

“Didn’t look,” his brother says and Peeta bites back a curse. “Keys are in the glove box.”

Peeta opens his mouth to ask what the fuck he’s supposed to do if someone realizes between now and then that the truck is unlocked and steals it, but there’s a loud crash and the sound of a child screaming.

“Fuck. I gotta go. Call us when you get to Capitol.”

The line disconnects and Peeta snaps his mouth shut. Then hangs up the phone with a little too much force. He listens to his change dropping down into the reservoir and clenches his jaw, breathing deeply a few times before he turns back around and returns to where he left his bag by the diner counter. His burger has arrived and he sits down to eat, keeping one eye on the bus terminal across the way to make sure he hasn’t misjudged the timing and gets left here without enough cash to buy another ticket home.

He swallows and rinses the food down with a coke. Barely flicking a smile and a “Thanks” at the waitress when she brings the check. When he’s done eating, he feels like a dick for leaving the tip almost all in change, but at this point, it’s better to assume that he’s going to need the bills he has left to put gas in the truck. It’s highly unlikely Levi thought to leave their dad’s old truck at the bus terminal with enough gas for Peeta to get home.

He doesn’t miss his bus, and even though the seats are still as uncomfortable as they were on the first leg of this trip, he manages to get some sleep. Probably because he’s just so damn tired at this point.

The bus driving over a speed bump and jostling violently enough to make a few of the passengers cry out is what wakes him. Peeta rubs the sleep from his eyes and blinks through the tinted windows at the eerily familiar bus terminal in Capitol City. It’s like he never left. He’s pretty sure he recognizes some of the graffiti on the wall and there’s still trash caught in the grass and weeds growing up against the chain link fence. 

Thankfully though, there are no flat tires on the truck. It hasn’t been stolen, and his brother left half a tank of gas. It’s enough, barely, to at least get him in the right county. He’ll probably still have to stop for gas somewhere around Seam.

The thought makes him pause, mid action while he’s pulling on the seatbelt. Maybe he should stop here for gas, he decides. Not that he thinks Katniss will still be in Seam, Alabama. But he’s paid attention to the new drivers in Tribute League every year and still hasn’t seen her name. Not as Katniss Everdeen, and not as Katniss Hawthorne.

He finishes buckling and drives off the lot, finding a gas station before heading towards the interstate. The drive goes by faster than he’d expect or want, dreading his return home. And that goes much as he’d expect, too. His mother gives him a perfunctory hug before telling him supper will be ready in a few minutes and she left clean sheets on for him on a bed upstairs but she didn’t have a chance to make it. 

He drops his bags in the old room he used to share with his brother and stares at the makeshift cot his mother set up for him, shoved against the wall. A set of clean, folded sheets sitting on top with a lumpy, stained pillow. Most of the room is taken up with several tables covered in craft projects at various stages of completion. Macrame, ceramics, mosaics set in stepping stones, jewelry and wind chimes. 

Well if he’s staying, he’s going to need his own place, he thinks with a wry twist of his lips.

The next few days are about as bad as he expected them to be. His last Baja check arrives, less than he was hoping for because he had to bow out before the season was over. He discovers just how fucking uncomfortable sleeping on a rickety old cot can be.

And he has to be present at his father’s funeral. Which he has nothing appropriate to wear to and has to borrow clothes from Levi, including a tie he has no idea how to tie. In the end, his brother ties it for Peeta, in brusque movements while they stand outside the church and his brother berates him for everything from his shoes looking scuffed to the fact that he never learned how to tie a necktie.

Somehow, he manages not to laugh or snort or scoff when anyone talks about what a great man his father was. A devoted husband and father. Eventually, he just stops listening and bows his head, hoping his body language can pass for contemplative rather than annoyed as fuck.

But eventually, the old bastard is in the ground and Peeta is somehow the one his mother holds onto as they walk back to the cars. Her heels keep sinking into the grass, so they have to walk slowly. By the time they make it to the house, his brothers are already hosting the guests, accepting casseroles and other assorted food. More condolences and thoughts on how much Bobby Mellark will be missed.

Unable to handle it a second longer, Peeta makes sure his mother is established on the sofa with a drink and then retreats upstairs. He shrugs out of the borrowed sports coat and yanks off the borrowed tie. Kicks off the thrift store dress shoes and flops onto the cursed cot to stare at the wall and ignore the murmur of voices and weeping from downstairs.

Eventually, he falls asleep and wakes up with a crick in his neck. He stretches and changes into jeans, surprised to see that it’s still light outside before heading downstairs.

“Oh good. You can help me get all this mess in the fridge,” his mother says and Peeta falls in, covering the dishes with foil or plastic wrap according to her dictates and finding places for everything in the fridge, all while his mother sits at the counter talking to her good friend, Francesca Cartwright, and sipping on cheap wine.

When he’s done with that, he finds Donald Cartwright in the living room, kicked back in his dad’s old recliner and watching a baseball game. Without a word, Peeta slips past him, out to the garage where he yanks on his boots and grabs his tool bag, tossing it in the truck before driving off.

He has no set plan except away. He’s been aimlessly driving around town for almost an hour when it occurs to him what he really wants to do. It somehow feels fitting. The only right thing to do after burying his father.

Stopping at an auto parts store, Peeta grabs an assortment of parts. He doesn’t want to consider what it means that almost everything he grabs works for a Chevy. He blows the last bit of his cash on the stockpile and throws up a silent thanks that Donald agreed to hire him on full time, starting Monday next week. At least he’ll make this wad back.

As he drives to the track just outside of Seam, he kneads the steering wheel and tries to calm the nervous butterflies crashing around his gut. He has no way of knowing if she’ll even be there. If she’s even driving tonight or if Gale is. Or maybe he’s missed her rise entirely. 

And if she is there, what is he going to do about it? She’s married. He’ll probably wind up just watching her and feeling like a schmuck who lost out. Although there is a part of Peeta that’s morbidly curious to see her with Gale. To see what exactly he lost out to.

By the time he makes it to the track, he’s convinced himself that this is a form of closure. A full circle stop on his journey of escaping his father’s fists and his drunken diatribes against Peeta’s worthlessness. Because Katniss was the first person he met when he ran away from home. And she was the first person who made him feel significant, valuable, wanted, even loved, if only for a night.

He parks in the grass field and leaves his tool bag in the truck. Pays for a ticket and finds a seat just as they’re announcing the lineup of drivers. He spots her car within seconds. Still looks the same except more beat up and worn a little more. In desperate need of a paint job. He waits as the names go down the list.

“And number twelve, Katniss Everdeen!”

Everdeen?

He claps, but he’s one of the few in the stands who does. By the time they finish, Peeta’s still mulling over the name. Then again, maybe Katniss chose not to change her name, he reminds himself. It’d be seen as odd around here, but it’s not impossible. He rests his forearms on his thighs and leans forward to watch the start. Within a few laps, he’s smiling to himself. Damn, she’s good. 

Not quite as improved as he would’ve expected after five years, but it’s a thing of beauty, watching her maneuver her car around the track, into tight spaces most would flinch away from to pass the other drivers. 

She does take a few hard hits, and when the race ends with her in fifth place, Peeta spends a few minutes debating. After all, she did say that she and Gale take turns driving the car. If it’s her night to drive, Gale would likely still be here as her pit crew.

Unless he’s not. He wasn’t here the night Peeta first saw Katniss drive.

Finally, he caves. Grabs his bag from the truck, tossing in a few spare parts he thinks she might need based on the way the car looked and sounded to be handling on the track. He heads towards the pasture that serves as a pit area and finds her pretty fast. She’s still driving her dad’s truck. That’s another sign in his favor, Peeta thinks as he approaches.

She’s got the hood of the car propped up and is staring into the engine bay with annoyance. She’s still so beautiful it makes his heart ache over what could have been. If he hadn’t been running from his father. If he hadn’t been desperate to get away. If he hadn’t already signed a contract in Levi’s name with the baja team. If if if what if.

She doesn’t look that different. More filled out in places. Her hips definitely look wider and curvier and he’d be lying if he didn’t admit to having a few x-rated thoughts when he notices. Her hair is braided back again, a few wisps escaping in the humid air, a few sticking to her face and neck with perspiration. The tank top she’s wearing is old and worn enough that he can see the outline of her bra and the ring of sweat stains under her arms.

As he gets closer, he can hear her muttering.

“Obstinate no good hunk of junk. You just remember that Rodney got replaced by Rhonda the pitbull and she just had puppies. I can sell you to the junkyard and the whole litter will piss on you.”

In that moment, he knows. He’s exactly where he’s supposed to be tonight. Even if she’s married still. He’ll be able to take this one perfect moment home with him tonight and live off the memory of her like this for another five years.

“Still bad mouthing your baby,” he says and her entire frame goes completely rigid. Does she remember him? He pokes to see if she does. “She’ll never purr for you if you threaten her.”

Katniss whirls around, a dark glare on her face. His smile wavers and he hesitates at the naked fury… and fear? That he sees in her eyes. But his father was probably right about how dumb Peeta is, he thinks, because he still opens his mouth and keeps talking.

“I half expected you and Gale to be on the NASCAR circuit by now as a kickass husband-wife duo.”

“Life didn’t turn out that way. Yet,” she says and he nods. He can understand dreams taking longer to achieve than you expected, after all. “How was baja?”

So she does remember. He works hard not to grin at her for it. “Great.”

“So why’re you here?”

“Missed home after all.” She stares at him, her piercingly gray eyes making it clear she doesn’t believe him.  So he shrugs. “And my dad died, so I was expected at the funeral.”

“Well, sorry for your loss,” she says and turns back to the car.

“Don’t be.”

He can’t leave, although he probably should. Before her husband shows up and kicks his ass. If he were her husband, he’d kick his own ass for the things he’s already done to her. The things he’s imagined doing to her. Just for having the audacity to approach her five years after making love to her followed by five years of nothing. But he can’t leave, so he moves to stand next to her, keeping his eyes on her and greedily searching for any kind of sign that she might still want him around or be interested in him. For a moment, for forever.

She crosses her arms over her belly and seems to shrink in on herself. The motion is so unlike the girl he remembers that it catches him off guard. Maybe she’s afraid of what will happen if Gale shows up, it occurs to him. Although that thought enrages him, he tries for a light tone as he pries.

“So should I scram before your husband welcomes me with a shotgun?” She snorts and looks over at him with a scowl. Only it’s less fierce this time.

“I could use a mechanic. But I might not be able to pay you,” she says, and they’re the best words he’s heard in a long time. His smile feels inevitable. Uncontainable. But he still doesn’t know about Gale.

“Same deal? And maybe watch my back so I don’t get shot.”

“Gale won’t be here,” she tells him and then waves towards the race car. “Alimony, you remember Peeta. Peeta, this is Alimony.”

He whistles and sets his bag down, trying not to break into a celebratory dance. It’s probably awful of him, being glad she’s divorced, but on the same token, she’s still a kickass driver and a gorgeous woman. Any sane man would be crawling on hands and knees for a chance with her. “No offense, but you got screwed.”

“In more than one way,” she mutters. He doesn’t comment on that, because how her marriage ended is none of his business… yet. But he grins as he digs the spare fuel line he bought tonight out of his bag.

“I brought something with me. Just for you.”

“A brand new fuel line. Got a radiator hose in that bag of tricks, too?”

“Glad you asked,” he says and produces that too. She smiles at him and his heart starts doing cartwheels. Coming here tonight, he decides, was the best decision he’s ever made.

“You sure know how to spoil a girl.”

[cowboymater]

i feel like i should justify the decision to expand haymitch’s family in my full-length fic of his games (16k words up now but it’ll be ~110k when i'm done)

in mockingjay, haymitch tells katniss that snow killed his mother, brother, and girl[friend] two weeks after his games. this feels like a pretty intentional parallel to katniss, who had her mother, prim, and gale as the people she was close to pre-games

and i understand making the parallel, esp when there’s only really a passing line abt his family, but i feel that a fleshed-out narrative (mine at least) is better served by enhancing the contrast between haymitch and katniss. let me explain:

haymitch goes into his games and wins them by embarrassing the capitol. his family is killed as punishment, and he descends into alcoholism to cope

snow doesn’t really have the option to kill katniss’s family, but if he had, i think it’s unlikely she would react the same way as haymitch. more probably she’d end up like johanna: angry, with nothing left to lose. when prim eventually dies she does shut down for a while, but we still see her get back up to assassinate coin

this is because, imo, katniss has a fairly dominant fight response. the gamemakers are ignoring her during her assessment? shoot at them. peeta says he likes her during his interview? lies, clearly, shove him into a large and breakable flowerpot. in mockingjay we see her butt heads with haymitch on this front, when she tears out the earpiece bc he’s telling her to retreat and she wants to take down the bomber jets

point: katniss had to develop this specific stress response because there was nobody there to take care of her, to fight the battles for her

haymitch, however, is very big on flight. he spent his entire games ignoring the mountain, the clear focal point of the arena, and getting as far from the action as he possibly could. he still fights when it comes down to it, but it’s never his first choice. after snow kills his family, he spends the next couple decades hiding at the bottom of a liquor bottle; while avoidance is understandable, remember that johanna suffers the same fate but goes down a very different path

haymitch (in my fic) still has to take on the role of provider as the eldest sibling and the only one eligible for tesserae. but w/ the additions there’s multiple parental figures to bear the load of raising his siblings, which serves as a buffer, and gives him the ability to practice avoidance instead of having to take initiative and confront everything head on

i feel that it makes a stronger contrast, at least for my purposes. katniss has no real support system when she goes into her games, and she gains one afterward (haymitch, cinna, peeta). expanding the abernathy family roster gives haymitch a support system that disappears after his games

i will be honest and say i do not remember my rationale for adding both a father and little sister, but for the grandmother i wanted to give him someone in his immediate life who had been alive before the games. haymitch displays a sort of defiance that nobody else really has the balls for, because to them the hunger games have been a thing forever. through his grandmother he's gained the perspective that yeah, this isn’t all-encompassing, the arena has to end Somewhere

it also hammers home one of my favorite things about the hunger games, which is the message of collective action and community. katniss might have been the face of the revolution, and her role is indispensable, but so is the role of everybody else. even just to make it out of the 74th games took a village: cinna crafted an image, peeta crafted a narrative, haymitch finagled sponsors. it’s because she gained this support system that she managed to accomplish what she did, in her games and still afterwards, and it’s because haymitch had his ripped away that he was lost for so long

because this is not a fix-it fic that means i now have to write a scene where they All get executed. which actually makes me a little nauseous to think abt. but them's the breaks ig

[thehungergamesbreakdown]

A Clever Drunk Devil.

Haymitch remains one of my favorite characters in the Hunger Games Series due to one fact - he is a clever devil. Haymitch Abernathy is far more clever than any person ever gives credit to. I have a personal theory about Haymitch but it requires to talk about his Games.

Haymitch participated in the Second Quarter Quell, the 50th Hunger Games. According to the Treaty of Treason and pulling a selected Quell out of a locked box, this Hunger Games would have double as many tributes. That meant Haymitch went in the arena with FORTY-SEVEN other kids. We get intimate details about Haymitch's game during the second book because Katniss and Peeta have been rewatching tapes of the previous Hunger Games. Both feel icky about watching Haymitch's tape because they feel like it's a massive invasion of his privacy but it's the only Quarter Queell tape they have.

Katniss describes Haymitch during his Reaping, "Haymitch's name is called last of all. It's more of a shock to see him than my mother. Young. Strong. Hard to admit, but he was something of a looker. His hair dark and curly, those gray Seam eyes bright and, even then, dangerous." (Collins, 91).

His games are a nightmare. The arena is set up in an idyllic meadow with such vibrant colors it almost seems like a dream but everything, and I do mean everything is poisonous and dangerous in a way. The entire game, Haymitch is focused on making his way to the edge of the arena - only to find a dry cliff with jagged rocks below.

During his game, he makes an alliance with the other District Twelve tribute, Maysilee Donner, and only splits with her after Maysilee says there are only five of them left and she doesn't want to kill him. Haymitch doesn't want to kill her either, so they part ways right at the edge of the arena.

This is where his cleverness really gleams. "Haymitch skirts along the edge of the cliff as if trying to figure something out. His foot dislodges a pebble and it falls into the abyss, apparently gone forever. But a minute later, as he sits to rest, the pebble shoots back up beside him. Haymitch stares at it, puzzled, and then his face takes on a strange intensity. He lobs a rock the size of his fist over the cliff and waits. When it flies back out and right into his hand, he starts laughing. (Collins, 92). Haymitch is the first tribute to figure out that the barrier will throw whatever you throw at it back at you. It's the same technology that keeps the tributes from jumping off the roof of the Training Arena.

A few minutes later, Maysilee is fatally injured by mutts and Haymitch runs towards her screams. He can't save her but he holds her hand while she dies. The same day, the rest of the tributes except for a girl from District 1 die. The two have a brutal battle where both are dealt fatal wounds and sooner rather than later, they are simply trying to outlast the other. Haymitch stumbles to the cliffs with his intestines hanging out and the girl is missing an eye.

"Haymitch makes a beeline for his cliff and has just reached the edge when she throws the ax. He collapses on the ground and it flies into the abyss. Now weaponless as well, the girl just stands there, trying to staunch the flow of blood pouring from her empty eye socket. She's thinking perhaps that she can outlast Haymitch, who's starting to convulse on the ground. But what she doesn't know, and what he does, is that the ax will return. And when it flies back over the ledge, it buries itself in her head. The cannon sounds, her body is removed, and the trumpets blow to announce Haymitch's victory." (Collins, 93).

Katniss realizes incredibly quickly that the Capitol was shocked Haymitch figured the barrier out and then later used it as a weapon. It wasn't even supposed to be a weapon! This made the Capitol look stupid and was just as bad as the berry trick Katniss and Peeta pulled. Because of this, Haymitch goes home and two weeks later his entire family and his girlfriend end up dead on President Snow's orders. Haymitch starts drinking.

My theory with Haymitch is that the killing of his loved ones wasn't just to punish him for the barrier stunt. President Snow saw this incredibly young, clever boy and wanted to make sure he could never be a problem ever again. So he murdered his loved ones and Haymitch began drinking. So President Snow won until the very when Haymitch got his hands on two fighters and did what no other mentor was able to do - he brought them both home.

As much as I'd love to continue talking about Haymitch, we'd be here all day. Our next post will be a rundown on the Capitol! See you then.

[bylertruther]

can i hear all of your thoughts on the ballad of songbirds and snakes? 👀

no ❤️ hehe ofc! this is just going to be a braindump bc it's been a while, but here are my thoughts! (under a read-more bc i be talkin)

first, i'd like to say that i was never one of those people that went ugh 🙄 who wants to hear about the bad guy 🙄. never! not even a little bit. snow was one of my favorites and i thoroughly LOVED every scene he was in. years later, those are the ones that stand out to me every time. also, i felt that collins had done a superb job of showing her understanding of such topics and her literary prowess, so even on a more technical note, i still couldn't understand why people were disappointed or thought it would be a fluff piece.

moving on to the book itself now: i liked this book because of snow 🤍 and the way it approached certain themes, like poverty and war and the politics stemming from both.

every page felt gripping to me, because snow is very much a Thinker^tm. a plotter. a schemer. he can never not be present, not even just in the moment, but in both the past and the future, too. he has this dogged persistence that was refreshing to me, bc it's very different to how katniss felt as someone that was thrust into something she never wanted in the first place. katniss was born into poverty and largely accepted that, bc she had no choice. snow was not, and thus can not accept this fate for himself, and fights it every step of the way.

as for poverty, i don't think that a lot of people understand just how much it can influence not just your entire life, but also the lives of your children should you keep the cycle going. it's something that demands to be known and dealt with; something that dictates how every little interaction with the world can or will go. it's especially brutal if you haven't always been poor or if you live in an area with such wealth inequality, like snow.

the importance and constant presence and reminder of hunger / food, appearances / clothes, outside mannerisms / internal monologue, drive / desperation, and the reasoning behind snow's actions make this exceptionally clear, i feel. you're not allowed to forget, not even for a moment, because snow can never forget. he also can't afford to, because his future and his social standing within society depends on it. he simply has no choice in the matter, esp not with his obsessive tendencies.

we're reminded again and again that snow doesn't have the same safety net as his peers. he has to be the best and he has to fight for everything, because otherwise he won't be able to pursue higher education and has no way of moving up. every decision that he makes is informed by that. when he sways, he inevitably remembers what it's like to be poor, and quickly shifts gears.

he remembers the war. he remembers all that he lost. he remembers what they had to do to survive. he carries that with him all the time. he's always going to look out for himself and ultimately do what's in his best interest, because there is no one that's able to do that for him. he has to do that not just for himself, but his family, too. you don't have to agree with him and the many justifications he makes for himself, but he is fighting his own fight the same way that other characters like katniss and gale were.

i'm reminded of this quote from lucy herself:

"people aren't so bad, really," she said. "it's what the world does to them. like us in the arena. we did things in there we'd never have considered if they'd just left us alone."

and i don't say this to excuse the things he does, or later goes on to do, but to reiterate that throughout the entirety of this book, snow is in a fight for survival. he even says that what he sees in district twelve reminds him of his time in the arena. of course, he's twisted this into a justification of his superiority, but he's acknowledging this point, and adding that "it takes very little to bring the beast to the surface."

like. everyone reacts to hardship and war differently. you have characters like gale and snow. you have characters like tigress, peeta, and sejanus. and you have characters like katniss and lucy gray.

there are millions of people in the world that wish to escape the boot. and there are many that when they do, rather than throwing it out entirely, they make the conscious decision to put it on themselves be the one to do the stepping this time. i don't agree with it, but i find it endlessly fascinating, because of how human it is. many people respond to cruelty with cruelty—eye for an eye—and justify it to themselves by equating it to order.

i also just loved, loved, loved how she dived into war and post-war society, too. the things people are willing to do to survive (cannibalism, crime, sex work, etc). what happens afterward (no-waste policies/culture, the winner imposes retaliatory violence and sanctions against the loser, propaganda culture, hostility and prejudice between opposing groups / classes, ptsd, restructuring society in such a way that it cannot happen again, etc).

it's like. i just. clenches fist. i love it when there are reasons behind evil. snow wasn't born that way—he was made. circumstance and his own decision-making along the way are what make him the man he is. there are many moments within the story that show you that he is capable of feeling things for others, many points where he does struggle to make a decision, and many points where he struggles even after making that decision, that show you that he is incredibly and undoubtedly human. that anyone is capable of being like him. that there are many people in this world that are just like him. this story is every bit as human and real and fascinating as the first three books were, and it didn't even need fantasy elements to make it so, bc it's just Real Life.

i focused on snow here bc he's my favorite, but i also really enjoyed sejanus and lucy gray, too. the tragedy of sejanus and his inability to be anything but himself is chef's kiss. when he cries out for his ma? omfg. SINISTER!!!!!!!!!!!! EVIL, EVIL, EVIL. and so real. and lucy gray is just that girl, that character, the One. if she were a vine, it'd be this one: "i'm a bad bitch you can't kill me". it didn't matter what snow did, bc she lived on despite his efforts and got the last laugh. "it's the things we love most that destroy us" #true but also not true bc he brought all that on himself, not her. and there are many such dr gauls in the world, too, trying their best to poison enough minds that it keeps their machine going even after they're gone. many such people that don't know when to stop or more accurately simply don't care to.

anyway. i loved it <3 loved it so much tht it bumped snow up to number 1 fave of the series and made me weep n wail bc i need more content from ms collins immediately </3

[zenkor123]

These insights by liberalk1tsch are of great relevance to my fanfic.

"she’d definitely skulk in the shadows afterwards though and want to do it even more than if she hadnt been asked not to"

That is probably true in my fic she was asked not to before by Peeta in her first watch in 13. He has exposure therapy to her in 13 from that.

"we see this even just a few sentences later when gale flat out offers to kill peeta and she’s «rattled by the brutality.»"

So she definitely does not approve of Gale trying to gun down Peeta at all. Though Gale got in alot of trouble and Peeta kicked Gale in the nuts before he could shoot him. She didn't get in trouble for the attempt though when she made the mutt comment it's likely that the perceived connection to Gale increased the anger she recieved from Holmes and Peeta was clearly angry at her for it. "I bet your lover Katniss is so happy" Peeta says to Gale. Though Peeta hates Gale (Gale cusses him out whenever they interact and Gale physically attacked Peeta before), and Gale did nothing to help Katniss when she was reassigned to the hospital wing, she has some distance from Gale, at least to Boggs, and Jackson.

", the tension between them alone is enough to drive her into a frenzy of wanting to remind him who he is. that’s part of why she didn’t visit him in 13 — because she knew it would distract her and she’d be forced to invest herself in his wellbeing."

A major question is why didn't she act on this urge, before. Well its obvious Coin would have her put in a restraining order for "harming Peeta's ability to work". Was Katniss ever in a restraining order besides when her attempt to stop Coin's resource allocations failed?

She must at a subconscious level want to retain her connection to Peeta, or act professional. In 13 there is also a lot more people watching then at midnight and Peeta is undergoing an existential crises in squad 451 so will yap about any topic related to himself. He also no longer cares about "work" or thinks that he needs to sacrifice his past for a future, he has already done that and he got no future. Though Peeta is devoid of any hope whatsoever and drowns out the present with drugs, but feels its his duty to make people see the truth that there is no hope anywhere. He has genuinely given up on reclaiming his memories(except for scavanging purposes) and is aware of which memories or Jackered and not but does not think he can do anything about it. In 13 as opposed to Squad 451,everyone was forbidden to talk about Peeta's memories by directive of President Coin for fear of triggering episodes. His memories can only be talked about in therapy and in therapy they are directed to help Peeta work. It's probably much safer in 451 where Boggs will leave this directive unenforced in contrast to 13. Also she wants to have a good record as Peeta's guard.

"as having to face this changed version of the boy she loves"

This kind of happened to a greater degree then canon and she was wrecked by it.

"that’s part of why she didn’t visit him in 13 — because she knew it would distract her and she’d be forced to invest herself in his wellbeing."

Katniss hasn't had to do this for a while, Peeta is in the work force and wants to take care of himself. He is legally an adult while Katniss is a minor according to 13 law.

"she doesn't want to attach herself to what might be left of him because she’s afraid of being hurt again, but that doesn't mean the feelings are gone."

Peeta probably wouldn't be interested at that point and she knows it. No one is allowed to tell Peeta that he isn't a mutation, who was a rapist runt before he was hijacked and saved by 13 and is now serving the rebellion living without shackles unlike the slave Peeta Mellark. Old Peeta Mellark's favorite color being purple and having a train of lovers and no known birthday.

What if hijacked PeetaHad the attitude of "Katniss Everdeen belongs in my memories and should stay there"And objected to Katniss having a watch on basis that "being in the present on the watch isn't the same place as my memories, that's just putting Katniss in my face! She is the face of all my episodes she needs to go" would Boggs have accepted Peeta's request? Would Katniss agree with Peeta?

i think if peeta was genuine about it and not just having an episode when he says it that boggs would definitely consider his request, however i think he’d only accept it if katniss agreed to it too.

he’d trust katniss’ judgement and go along with whatever she says as the only person who really knows peeta (obv finnick does too, but not «always sleep with the windows open» close) to gauge if this is the type of situation where he kinda needs to be forced into it as a form of exposure therapy or if it really is better to leave him alone.

that being said, she obviously struggles a lot with her mental health in mj and we see in her first spoken interaction with peeta after the hijacking when she says that he sees her for who she really is — deadly, manipulative, etc. — that she really doesn’t think very highly of herself at this point. if peeta phrased it in a way that put her down and brought on a bout of self hatred, i think she might let him be, but i know every fibre of her being would want to stay with him.

to make a long answer shorter: i think boggs would go along with whatever katniss chooses, and i think katniss would choose based on how peeta asks and how her mental health is in the moment. she wouldnt do it lightly, but i think she’d accept it if she thought it’s what he really wanted.

she’d definitely skulk in the shadows afterwards though and want to do it even more than if she hadnt been asked not to💀 the poor girl loves him after all.

[travllingbunny]

I can't stop thinking about the Mockingjay/The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes parallels, and the meanings of "The Hanging Tree". When she first sings the song, we get a long analysis of it from Katniss' POV, finishing with this:

"The phrase Where I told you to run, so we’d both be free is the most troubling because at first you think he’s talking about when he told her to flee, presumably to safety. But then you wonder if he meant for her to run to him. To death. In the final stanza, it’s clear that that’s what he was waiting for. His lover, with her rope necklace, hanging dead next to him in the tree.

I used to think the murderer was the creepiest guy imaginable. Now, with a couple of trips to the Hunger Games under my belt, I decide not to judge him without knowing more details. Maybe his lover was already sentenced to death and he was trying to make it easier. To let her know he’d be waiting. Or maybe he thought the place he was leaving her was really worse than death. Didn’t I want to kill Peeta with that syringe to save him from the Capitol? Was that really my only option? Probably not, but I couldn’t think of another at the time."

This was, of course, huge foreshadowing for what indeed does happen to Peeta when he is hijacked. Mockingjay was my favorite novel in the original trilogy (and Mockingjay part 1 my favorite THG film) and the hijacking storyline is one of the big reasons.

Peeta is indeed given a fate "worse than death" when he is turned into a "mutt". He is referred to as "mutt" many times in the book. We - and Katniss - were prepared to think something horrible was done to him, but did not expect that he would be turned into an unrecognizable psychological mutant-monster, who tries to kill the girl he loves and who loves him, a monster filled with violence and cynicism who believes her to be a monster trying to kill him, an absolutely ruthless killer, a heartless minx who just pretended to love him and toyed with him and another guy for her own amusement, and all the worst things you can imagine.

Which all now sounds incredibly familiar after reading TBOSAS. Hijacked Peeta is basically Coriolanus Snow hunting Lucy Gray in the woods. There's absolutely no doubt that Snow personally came up with the scenario for Peeta's hijacking.

During that scene in TBOSAS, Snow hears Lucy Gray singing that last verse of "The Hanging Tree". Among his not-very-coherent thoughts at the moment, since he is in the midst of completely losing it, he thinks it's her playing games with him, telling him she knows about Sejanus. But throughout the book or at least in Chapter 3, and especially towards the end, he has repeatedly misunderstood her and things she told him, over and over. He also thought she was trying to kill him with the snake she left with the shawl he had given her, but whether or not she even left the snake, it turns out she definitely was not trying to kill him, since the snake was not venomous. Playing some sort of a mind game really doesn't seem like something she would really do at such a moment, and if this was really her singing, then it's the last thing we ever heard Lucy Gray Baird say.

When I went back and re-read Katniss' quote, the line "maybe he thought the place he was leaving her was really worse than death" made it click for me.

There is a mention of what a fate worse than death would be in TBOSAS, too, at the beginning of Chapter 3, when Snow fears what Capitol may have done to Lucy Gray, rather than just send her to District 12, and he thinks she may have been "imprisoned, killed, or turned into an Avox. Or worse, sent to a life of experimentation in Dr Gaul's lab of horrors". Again, being turned into a mutt - mutant-monster is singled out as the worst fate possible.

At the end of Chapter 3, we find out that Snow's time in District 12 and so much of what happened had been intentionally set up by Dr. Gaul as a part of his "education". In a a way, he was a part of her experiment, which helped turn him from a pretty normal human (entitled, selfish, over-ambitious, but human and with some good impulses too) to a complete monster, utterly evil and emotionally dead inside. While the people who loved him died (or presumably died) because of him, he survived and became Dr. Gaul's favorite mutt.

[endlessnightlock]

Ooh, 2 and/or 4 with Everlark please? :)

Not gonna lie @heathersaid this one was my favorite! Thanks for the prompt.

2. “Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck this shit. Fuck”

From this drabble prompt list.

Katniss sat on the counter of the employee break room with one arm wrapped around her waist in a protective measure. She held her tea mug in the other, using it to gesticulate because she couldn’t find the words to tell Johanna how truly awful her run-in with their spawn of the devil manager had been, no matter how much her co-worker prodded.

The entire day had been a shit show, with the air conditioning in Katniss’s old car deciding to stop working on the way to the office. Not to mention she forgot her lunch and purse, and then, as the perfect, you should have brought along a jar of Vaseline because you’re getting the screwing of your life from the universe, the strap on her left sandal broke while crossing the parking lot. All of this was before Coin tore her a new one over what she called Katniss’s “mismanagement” of the marketing campaign- one she hadn’t wanted to work on in the first place. 

Everything that transpired had a hand in the mute episode Katniss found herself in the middle of. She was so done with this place. 

“Well?” Johanna prodded, staring at her expectantly. “Was Coin making the face that looks like an angry corpse?”

Katniss sighed before taking a sip of the tea in her mug and frowned- it needed a lot more sugar. “How about a recap tomorrow?” she offered. “I just can’t go there today.”

“Fine,” Johanna agreed, “but I’m going to want every detail, so you’d better be ready bright and noonish.”

“Details about what?” Peeta asked, entering the break room, brushing past Johanna as she backed out the door to get back to her desk.

“Shit day,” Katniss mumbled. Her cheeks felt hot, so she stared into the bottom of her mug until Johanna left the break room. She rolled her eyes but smiled down into her cup again. She glanced up at Peeta, and he winked at her.

Katniss and Peeta had been on more than a few dates recently, and since the relationship was new, they hadn’t let HR know yet because how awkward would that be if it didn’t work out? They were keeping things under wraps. Katniss didn’t think they could keep their relationship a secret much longer. Not with their chemistry or the familiarity between them that came with liking someone as much as she liked Peeta. 

“Sorry to hear that. Want to talk about it?” Peeta asked quietly, opening the fridge door and digging out his lunch bag before shutting it again and facing her.

Katniss shook her head. “No,” she murmured, watching Peeta set his lunch on the counter next to where she was sitting. He opened the bag and pulled out what looked like a giant sandwich on those homemade bread rolls he got from his family’s bakery. Without a word, he gave her half, and she smiled gratefully. She told him earlier she’d forgotten her lunch. He always offered to share his food with her, but today she decided to take him up on it, potential fodder for the office gossip mill if they were spotted sharing his food be damned.

Katniss was swallowing her first bite when Peeta wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and spoke up. “You know what always makes me feel better when I’m pissed? Letting out a string of swears. Even if it doesn’t fix your problem, a good, loud fuck is guaranteed to make you feel better.”

She laughed at the double entendre. “I wouldn’t know,” she teased before taking another bite of her sandwich. They haven’t had sex with each other yet, although god knows she’s thought about it often enough. 

Peeta rubbed the back of his neck, “I think it’ll do wonders for your disposition.” Before stepping closer, he glanced around the breakroom, making sure no one was paying attention to them. “Seriously, just let it all out,” he whispered, brushing her knee with his thumb.

“Fine,” Katniss said, catching his eye. “Fuck.”

Peeta squeezed her knee and grinned. “You’re damn right, fuck. Do it again.”

She had to admit it was a freeing feeling, so she tried it again with enthusiasm. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” she said. “Fuck this shit.”

Peeta laughed, and before Katniss realized what he was going to do, he leaned close and kissed her. Over his shoulder, she caught Johanna’s wolfish grin and Finnick’s wink through the break room window. Dammit. Well, fuck. Guess their secret was out of the bag.

[thealtoduck]

Being from District 1 and being in the 75th Hunger Games with Finnick…

Finnick Odair x Male reader

Warnings: It’s the goddamn hunger games so people dying and lots of violence, talk about two people hooking up.

(A/N: This is based on the movie because i didn’t feel like re-reading the book before writing this)

Growing up in District 1 had it’s advantages because unlike most districts yours has a good relationship with the capital and you are illegally trained for the hunger games so you get an advantage.

…buuuut there is a disadvantage, you are taught the games are just that GAMES and ignore the parts where you might end up traumatised or worse dead.

And that is how you ended up in the games, you volunteered but mostly because you were taught that the games are a good thing and because your parents pressured you into it.

However you ended up winning but not without some mental scars.

You took your winnings and moved into the victors village but without your parents not ever wanting to speak to them again.

You lived peacefully for a while until you didn’t because the capitol decided that for the third quarter quell the tributes would be reaped from the victors of each district.

When you saw that you may or may not have had a nervous brakedown.

Then came the day of the reaping, you told yourself that you were not likely to be picked since District 1 had several other Male victors.

”As for the male tribute… Y/N L/N”

But then you were picked anyway… *cries*

So alongside Cashmere you headed for the Capitol in one of their fancy trains.

You had been allowed to chose your mentors, Cashmere had chosen her brother Gloss. You had picked Augustus Braun, Panem’s favorite son, (he was a character created for promo photos for the movies, the guy who ”plays” him is really hot). He had been your mentor during the year you won so he knew how to work with you and plus he is nice :).

When you arrived at the trainstation there were a huge crowd waiting for you. Augustus advised you to try to appear sad but still wave to the capitol citizens and treat them kindly so they might sympathize with the fact that your back in the games.

You met up with your prep team and they made you strip naked so that they could look you over and make you look presentable.

After they finished they got you into your outfit for the tribute parade.

(A/N: Your outfit is whatever the male version of this would look like)

You were walking towards the chariots for the parade when you heard a catcall whistle and you knew immediately who it was.

You turned around and were met with a almost naked Finnick Odair a familiar sight as you had hooked up the year before while being mentors for the tributes.

”Hello Finnick” you said in a voice implying that you were not in the mood for his flirting.

He caught the hint and the two of you had a normal conversation. You asked how Annie and Mags were doing as you were rather fond of both of them.

He said they were doing fine considering the cicumstances. The two of you talked for a while but eventually Finnick went to try to make Katniss Everdeen uncomfortable for fun.

You climbed in to the chariot and helped Cashmere get up as she was wearing 8 inch stilettos.

After the tribute parade you are escorted to the training center with the rest of your group.

The next day training began, you went directly for the throwing knives which was your preferred weapon.

Then you were approached by Peeta Mellark, last years winner, he asked you to show him how to throw knives. You agreed to show him and you gave him some tips and tricks that you used. He then showed you how to do some simple camouflage.

You liked Peeta he was the kind of person that was hard not to like, unlike his district partner.

You and Cashmere invited Katniss to the place where they showed you how to make hammocks and it was noticable that she was a bit suspicious to be talking to career tributes.

The training days passed by and you did well on your private session but now it was time for the interviews.

When you got out on the stage you threw your arms around Caesar Flickerman as if he was your lover, which in turn got you a ”Awww” from the audience.

You turned on the waterworks, you talked about how much you will miss the capitol citizens for treating you like family and that you regret not reconciling with your parents after a fight you had before you left and not getting to say goodbye to them. It was all lies though but it was enough to fool the audience.

The audience gave you a standing ovation while you joined Cashmere standing in a line above the stage.

The rest of the tributes gave their interviews (Johanna’s was your favorite) and then Peeta during his interview told Caesar that Katniss was pregnant and all hell broke lose.

That evening you were visited by Haymitch and he told you that Peeta had wanted you as an ally and about the rebellion and about their plan to get Katniss out of the arena.

You agreed to the plan.

Before you went in to the arena you said goodbye to your escort, prep team, stylist, Gloss and Augustus.

You also said goodbye Cashmere since you knew you were on different sides in the arena and you said a silent prayer that you wouldn’t have to be the one to kill her.

You were then taken aboard the hovercraft and flown to the arena. You were then escorted to the small elevator thing that takes you the podiums in the arena.

You stood in the elevator waiting anxiously for the game to start. You also realised that you didn’t know who your other allies would be other than Katniss and Peeta.

The podium then started rising until you were inside the arena. Your eyes were blinded by the sunlight and you looked around and saw that the podioum was surrounded by water.

You saw that there were rocky spokes connected to the island where the cornucopia was located.

Then you heard a voice saying ”Let the 75th Hunger Games begin, May the odds be ever in your favor” a voice started counting down from 10 and you prepared yourself to dive in.

A canon went of as the starting signal for the games and you dove right in to the water and swam to one of the rocky spokes and climbed up on it.

You saw someone else had climbed up on it behind you but didn’t care to find out who so you tried to run but they had roughly grabbed a hold of your arm and were trying to drag you back.

You turned around and saw the male tribute from district 9. Without thinking further about it you clenched your fist and punched him in the nose. He let go of you and you started running towards the cornucopia.

You looked around and realised that you were now at a disadvantage from only being held back for a few seconds.

You reached the cornucopia and tried to sneak around it to see who was there but Finnick suddenly appeared around the corner and pointed his trident at you for a second but brought it down as soon as you made eye contact.

”Come on” he said and led you to the weapons. You picked up vest with a bunch of throwing knives attached to it and put it on.

You had put it on just in time as the man from 9 had reached the cornucopia as well. His nose was bleeding from your punch. You got a knife from the vest took aim and threw a knife at his throat, you hit just as intended.

You got an extra leg holster with throwing knives and a regular knife incase needed for close combat.

Finnick told you to stay by the supplies to guard them with Katniss while he looks for Peeta. You nodded at him as he ran off.

Katniss and you stood guard for a while until Finnick returned saying Mags had found him. You and Katniss followed him as he led you out on one of the spokes leading out from the cornucopia.

You saw movement in the water as Peeta was wrestling with a tribute trying to drown him. Finnick dived in to help Peeta, you turned to the cornucopia to check so no one would sneak up behind you.

Soon enough Peeta and Finnick were out of the water and the 5 of you made your way in to the jungle.

You all ran through the difficult jungle terrain except Mags who was carried on Finnick’s back.

After getting far enough from the cornucopia you all kneeled down for a quick rest. You heard more canons going off meaning more people had died.

”I guess were not holding hands anymore” Finnick said with a quick laugh. ”You think that’s funny?” Katniss asked with obvious hostility in her voice. You made quick eye contact with Peeta basically saying ”Fuck, they are going to be fighting”.

”Every time that canon goes of it’s music to my ears, i don’t care about any of them” Finnick answered. ”Good to hear” Katniss said pulling out a machete from her quiver. ”Wanna face the career pack alone? What would Haymitch say?” Finnick asked teasingly.

”Haymitch isn’t here” Katniss stated and there was silence for a moment until Peeta said ”Let’s keep moving” and you all got up and continued moving through the jungle.

Peeta walked in front using the machete to cut plants and vines out of the way, Finnick was behind him carrying Mags, you were behind Finnick and Katniss was behind you.

You noticed Katniss stopping behind you as you turned to see if anything was wrong she yelled ”Peeta! NO!” and right behind you there was a bang and you were knocked to the ground by Peeta flying backwards.

You sat up and saw Katniss crawling over to Peeta repeating his name slowly as he lay motionless on the ground. You then heard her say in a panicy voice ”He’s not breathing”, Finnick ran over to him and started doing mouth to mouth resuscitation. You crawled over to see what was happening.

After a while he woke up again and you all started to move slowly but Katniss was now in the lead, she threw small rocks at the barrier so that you could navigate how close you were to it.

Katniss told the 4 of you to wait while she climbed up a tree to see your location and if she could find fresh water. When she got down she told you that you were on the edge of the arena and that she couldn’t find any water.

Finnick suggested that you should set up camp and sleep, he said he could take first watch to guard the others to which Katniss disagreed which in turn made Finnick upset since he literally saved Peeta.

Honestly you were tired of both of them so you rolled your eyes and walked away to find somewhere decent to sleep.

You found a spot close to Mags where you laid down and shut your eyes but that didn’t last long as you heard the anthem playing and you looked up and saw the faces of the fallen tributes.

When you saw the face of the man from district 9 you felt ashamed. You wondered if he had a lover or children at home who had to watch him bleed to death from a knife to the throat.

You turned around so you lay on your other side and your y/c/e met with Mags kind eyes and she gave you a small smile as if she had read you mind which you returned shyly.

(A/N: I had to stop a second just for some Mags appreciation because she’s one of my favorite characters in the hunger games universe.)

You closed your eyes again trying to sleep but you then heard something hit the ground you sat up and looked to Katniss and Finnick who had gone to inspect the noise.

It turned out to be a sponsor gift, you stood up and walked over to them. Katniss held a small silvery thing. ”What is it?” Finnick asked. ”It’s from Haymitch…… I think it’s a spile” Katniss answered.

”A what?” Both you and Finnick asked as Katniss stood up and found a tree and started banging on the spile with a rock hitting it in to the tree.

You all waited for a moment but soon water started trickling down from the spile. Katniss caught some in her mouth and told the others to get some, first Peeta got some, then Finnick and the you.

You were on you knees infront of the spile, you got a mouthful of water. Finnick walked up beside you with a small smile and said ”As much as i like seeing you on your knees, can you move over a little? I need some more water for Mags”. You laughed a little and moved aside.

”Seems like someone has gotten his wittiness back” you said and Finnick gave a small laugh and started filling a leaf he had shaped like a bowl for Mags.

After that you went to your previous resting place and laid down to sleep again. You were woken up at some point by what sounded like a gong and the sound of lightning but you managed to get back to sleep.

You were woken up by the sound of Katniss screaming, you quickly got up and pulled out your close combat knife. You saw no one but Katniss, she was laying on the ground whimpering and there was a closing in behind her.

”Run! Run! The fog is poisonus” she yelled you helped Mags get up as Finnick crouched down to get her up on his back. When she was safely up you started running following Katniss and Peeta.

You passed Katniss and Peeta as being quick was sort of your specialty.

It was hard to know where to go as almost everywhere you turned the fog seemed to be coming closer. You heard falling behind you and saw that Katniss had fallen over but Peeta had helped her up. Then a little bit after that Peeta fell over and Katniss helped him up, you turned around to come to their aid but you heard Finnick screaming and saw him falling over.

You ran to Finnick to help him get up but by the time you got there he was already up and he had gotten Mags back up on his back. You grabbed him by the arm and helped him away from the fog. You and Finnick saw that Peeta had fallen over once again from exposure to the fog.

You and Finnick ran to him and Katniss. ”I can’t carry him, Peeta please” she said with tear stained eyes. You tried to help carry Peeta but it was no use you weren’t strong enough.

Behind you heard Finnick saying ”Mags? Mags?” You turned around and saw Mags walking right into the fog (like the boss she is).

(R.I.P Queen, both the actress and character)

”MAGS!” Finnick screamed and the came the sound of canon. You grabbed Finnick by the arm and Katniss told him that we need to leave.

Finnick helped pick up Peeta as you picked up Peeta’s machete and started cutting away plants that were in the way. The others staggerd away from the fog, you ran to Katniss side to try help her keep up.

You feel the fog touching you back as immense pain shoot through you whole body and then the 4 of you fell… not because the fog though but because there was a huge drop that you hadn’t noticed.

When you land you just lay on the ground twitching and flinching from the pain.

After a while you hear Katniss saying ”The water, the water helps”. You tried to get up but you body was like on lockdown. You hear them helping Finnick into the water, Finnick tries to let out a scream but gets water in his mouth.

Peeta comes to you and drags you up into a sitting positon saying ”Come on” as if he’s talking to a child but it was strangely comforting. He then pulls you into the pond making you let out a scream from a sudden sharp pain but the pain slowly starts to fade away.

The group takes a little brake now to rest and you can’t help but to whisper a little ”thank you” to Mags.

You then hear Katniss saying to Finnick ”I’m sorry about Mags”. Finnick answered by saying ”She was never gonna make it….so”.

Finnick then turned his attention to something behind Katniss, you turned around and saw some sort of monkey like creature staring at you, whatever they were they didn’t look friendly so you pulled out your combat knife in one hand and a throwing one in the other.

All 4 of you stood in the little pond surrounded by the mutts, you were all waiting for one to attack. ”Get to the beach” Katniss said and turned towards a path that lead towards the cornucopia but the mutts started looking more aggressive.

One tried to jump at Katniss but was cut down by Peeta which made more start to attack.

You weren’t really that well equipped to deal with animals but you tried your best. A mutt tried to jump at you but you kicked it in the face and threw a knife at it.

Another one ran towards you so threw a knife at it’s arm making it shriek in pain and you ran over and stabbed it with the combat knife.

”We need to get to the beach” Peeta said as he and Katniss started moving in the beaches directon, you started following him and Katniss and made sure Finnick was keeping up.

You made you way through the difficult terrain while trying to avoid the mutts. You did your best to hit then with your knives but the didn’t pack enough of a punch to kill them unless they were hit in sensitive areas.

You were tackled by a mutt which made you fall to the ground. It crawled onto you about to maul your face off but you stabbed it in the stomach and twisted the knife.

You threw it’s dead body off of you and got up, you saw Katniss and Peeta carrying someones body to the beach, you turned your head back and saw Finnick fending of the mutts. Your mind raced for a second if Finnick is there and Peeta and Katniss are fine the who’s body was that.

You ran over to Finnick who was slowly making his way to the beach backwards with the mutts following him, only held back by his trident. You stood by his side swinging your blade at any mutt that comes to near you two.

Finnick then whispered to you ”At my signal grab my hand”, you nodded.

”Now” he said and you grabbed his hand and the two of you started sprinting towards the beach while the mutts chased yoy, when you got near enough you and Finnick dove on to the beach sand.

You and Finnick quickly got up and pointed your weapons at the mutts that where now on the edge of the jungle where the beach began. You then heard a canon going off and the mutts then started making their way into the jungle once more.

You put you knife in the holster at your leg and then turned to Finnick. You threw your arms around him in a hug, Finnick put his big arms around and you leaned you head against the older males shoulder.

It was hard putting a label on yours and Finnick’s relationship. You had met during part of your victory tour in district 4, you were attending a dinner in your honor.

You had excused yourself to go to the public bathroom during the dinner. You had no need to actually use the bathroom. You just needed to get away from the people who had celebrated the fact that you had killed people.

You started having a bit of a nervous breakdown in the bathroom, you were crying, splashing water in your face trying to calm down but you felt like you needed to scream.

One of the toilet stalls had opened and Finnick steped out. He went to the sink to wash his hands and while doing so he noticed your red eyes and trembling hands and he asked if you were okay.

And you spilled everything to him and told him how you were feeling, he put an arm around you, he told you he somtimes felt like that as well and told you how he usually copes with it.

He had told you that if you didn’t want to finish the dinner he could go out and tell everyone you weren’t feeling well and have you escorted back to the train.

But you said you wanted to try to get through the dinner as long as he was there to help you. He agreed to be there with you and you managed to get through the whole thing.

After that Finnick was basically your bestie and you guys would come to each other for emotional support.

And last year during the 74th hunger games while you both were in the capitol, you had been hanging out at his apartment the capitol give the victors while they visit for the games.

While hanging out things got a bit steamy between the two of you and you ended up hooking up, the day after the two of you kinda acted like it never happened and things got a bit awkward between you and him.

But being back in to the arena had stirred up feelings for him you had buried. While in the arena most people will latch onto whatever makes them feel safe and Finnick made you feel safe.

You finally let go of Finnick and you noticed a hover craft picking up the body Peeta and Katniss had taken in to the water. Finnick told you he was gonna go try to catch some fish food, you nodded at this and walked over to Katniss and Peeta.

”Who body was it they picked up?” you asked. ”The female morphling” Peeta answered in a saddend voice. You sat down in the sand, the 4 of you had almost died 3 times (+ 1 for Peeta) in less than 24 hours and it was exhausting.

Finnick had managed to catch a fish and found some oysters that you were now eating. Peeta found a pearl and gave it to Katniss.

You then heard a scream coming from the jungle, ”That’s new” Peeta said and you heard a thundering noise.

Out of the jungle came a huge wave of water and you heard a canon going off. The wave was so big it washed up on the beach.

You then saw a hover craft lifting away the body.

After it had flown away you heard Katniss say ”Someone is hear”. You immediately looked in the direction Katniss had been looking and saw another tribute on the beach and two other tributes emerging from the jungle, you backed up slowly.

”Johanna?” Finnick whispered and ran out of hiding towards Johanna shouting her name, ”Finnick!” she yelled back and the two embraced each other. You made your way towards them and waved Johanna.

Johanna told the 4 of you how she, Wiress, Beetee and Blight, her district partner, had been wandering the jungle when it had started raining blood on them to the point where they could barely see and were choking on it. Then blight had hit the forcefield and passed away.

Wiress was stumbling around murmering the words ”Tick-tock” to herself, Wiress tried to get Johanna’s attention but she ignored her.

”What’s wrong with her?” Katniss asked referring to Wiress. ”She’s in shock, dehydration isn’t helping” Beetee answered and the asked ”You have fresh water?”

”We can get some” Katniss answered as Johanna had started getting fed up with Wiress saying ”Tick-Tock” to her. ”Listen stop it!” Johanna said loudly while grabbing a hold of Wiress.

”Hey! Get of her” Katniss yelled as Wiress fell to the ground. Katniss stromed passed you and started fighting with Johanna. ”Hey!, what are you doing” Johanna asked as Katniss got up in her face but before things could escalate Peeta and Finnick had pulled them apart.

You got the spile and hit it in to a tree so that the others could get freshwater. You took a big leaf and shaped it like a bowl and got some water for Beetee who was working with some sort of wire. Katniss and Wiress then came excitedly and said that the arena was a clock with different obstacles every hour.

You all decided to go to the cornucopia to stock up on weapons, you had decided to get something more lethal than just knives just in case something comes up.

Katniss was trying to go through what happens during every hour that we know off. When you arrived at the Cornucopia you refilled your knife supply and picked up a nice sword. The others were drawing up a map of the zones and the drew the threats we knew about tsunami, lightning, blood rain, fog and mutts.

Then came a loud gasp from Wiress who was being stabbed in the back by the male tribute from district 10 (you know since your here instaed of Gloss). Katniss was quick to shoot an arrow hitting him right in the chest killing him almost instantly.

Another figure had appeared it was Cashmere she had a knife in her hand. She was on her way to attack Katniss but Johanna pushed her out of the way and plunged her axe right in Cashmere’s chest.

Right as she hit the ground there came clang of metal against metal and you saw Brutus attacking Finnick and Peeta. Enobaria then suddenly appears and throws a knife at Finnick cutting his arm. You quickly draw a knife throwing at Enobaria cutting her shoulder.

Enobaria and Brutus start running away from the cornucopia. You, Katniss and Johanna run to follow them but as you do the island the cornucopia is located on starts spining and you all fall to the ground.

You take out a knife in one hand and stab it in to the ground to try to keep you from sliding of the island, you manage to get a good grip with your hand as well.

You hear struggling behind you and see Johanna struggling to keep a hold of Katniss’ hand, she lost her grip and Katniss fell into the raging water.

The island then stopped spining and Katniss climbed up on one of the spokes and started coughing up water. Johanna and Peeta checked that she was okay.

She was fine and your group left the island and went back to the beach, you all sat down on the beach to stratergize. Other than the group there was 3 people left in the games Chaff, Brutus and Enobaria.

They were all outnumbred so they probably won’t try to attack us. Johanna suggested that we hunt them down but then you heard a scream ”Ahhh!!! Katniss,Help me!!!” which made Katniss scream in return ”Prim!!! Prim!!!” as she ran into the jungle.

You all ran to follow her Finnick was in front you were right behind him but then you hit something almost like when you run in to a glass door, it was an invisible forcefield. ”Y/n!Are you okay?” You heard Peeta saying as you sat up.

”Yeah” you said as he helped you up. You tried to touch the forcefield, it was as solid as a brick wall. Soon Katniss and Finnick came running back with a bunch of birds following them but they couldn’t get through the forcefield and were stuck on the other side.

You had to wait an hour until the birds flow away and the forcefield disappeared. You ran over to Finnick to check on him. ”Are you okay? You asked putting a hand on his shoulder. ”Yeah, i’m fine” he said weakly.

You the heard Johanna say something about ”Riots in the damn capitol” she then yelled ”Hey! How does that sound Snow! What if we.. What if we set your backyard on fire?! You know you can’t put everybody in here!!!”. You were all looking at Johanna speechless at her open disrespect of President Snow.

”What?… they can’t hurt me, there’s no one left that i love” Johanna said and walked away to get Katniss some water. That left you feeling bad for Johanna, sure she may be a bit rude at times but she’s nowhere near as bad as some people make her out to be.

You helped Finnick stand up and your group made their way back to the beach once more. Finnick went and sat down in the shallow part of the water. You were torn whether you should go to him or not, maybe he wanted to be alone.

But then you remembered how he had been there for you during your victory tour, so you went out into the water and sat down beside him. ”Did you hear her?” You asked referring to Annie.

Finnick gave you a small nod. You didn’t know what more to say, but you didn’t need to cause Finnick started speaking ”I also heard you”. You gave him a questioning look ”Really?”

”Yeah, even though in knew you were there right infront of me, it was still torture to have to hear you screaming my name for help, I had to open my eyes just to check that you were okay” Finnick said turning his attention from the water to you. You grabbed his hand gently and said ”I’m okay, thanks to you”. You and Finnick’s heads were leaning close to eachother but then came a shout ”Finnick!” ”Y/n” it was Johanna she waved for you to come over.

You and Finnick got up and walked over to the others and the group made a plan to use the wire Beetee had gotten to hopefully electrecute the careers.

A few hours went by and the sun started to go down. You were sitting in the wet sand watching Finnick swinging around his trident lightly. Then you heard the noise of something hitting the ground near you, you turned around.

A little bit inside the jungle you saw a silver capsule, you went into the junge and got it. You opened it and knew immediately what it was. You turned to the others and yelled at them to come over. You showed them that you had gotten bread from district 1.

You gave everyone their fair share of the bread, ”District 1 is known for using cinnamon and huckleberries in their bread” you informed them though the only one who actually seemed to care what your district used in their bread was Peeta.

Then it was time to leave to go to the lightning tree and once again you were making your way through the thick jungle terrain.

Then you heard the anthem playing and you looked up in the sky to see the pictures of the fallen tributes. You felt a bit sad when you saw Cashmere up there and realised even if you got out of the arena Gloss would kill you.

But it felt worse seeing Wiress and Mags up there. They had both been very kind people and they shouldn’t have been in here in the first place. You felt something inside you almost as if it was catching fire (A/N:😉) a new hatred for the capitol.

You continued moving until you reached the lightning tree and Beetee started doing his thing and wrapping the tree with the bronze colored wire. He then told you, Katniss and Johanna to go with the spool of wire to the beach, throw it into the water and go to the tree in the 2 o’clock sector.

”I’m gonna go with them as a guard” Peeta said probably not wanting to leave Katniss. ”Nonono, your staying here to protect me… and the tree”. Beetee opposed. ”No i need to go with her” Peeta said stubbornly.

”There are two careers out there, i need two guards” Beetee said. ”Finnick can protect just fine on his own” Peeta said and you and Finnick gave eachother a knowing look. Then Katniss butted in saying ”Yeah, why can’t Finnick, Y/n and Johanna stay with you and Peet and I will take the chord”.

”You all agreed to keep me alive till midnight, correct?” Beetee asked in a annoyed tone. ”It’s his plan we all agreed to it” Johanna said clearly starting to get annoyed as well. ”Is there a problem here?” Finnick asked. ”Excellent question” Beetee said as you were all staring down Peeta and Katniss.

”No, there’s no problem” Katniss said in a defeated manner and walked over to Peeta and gave him a kiss. After they finished you said ”Good idea” and walked over to Finnick and kissed him, you could feel him kiss back and put his arms around your waist.

After you pulled away you said with a weak smile ”You know just incase we never see eachother again”. ”Alright, let’s go” Johanna said. You walked over to her and put an arm around her shoulder saying jokingly ”Incase your feeling left out i can give you a quick kiss too”, Johanna only rolled her eyes but let out a small chuckle.

You, Johanna and Katniss made your way to the beach once more the same way you came. After a while of walking Johanna said ”Come on, i wanna put as much distance between me and this beach as possible, frying is not how i wanna go” but then came another sound from the spool it had stopped putting out wire.

”There’s something…” Katniss said and looked in the direction the wire came from but saw nothing then something pulled the wire and cut it off. Katniss immediately threw aside the spool and pulled out an arrow but Johanna grabbed the spool and hit her over the head with it.

You were kinda lost on what to do but Johanna got you to kneel down beside her and took your combat knife and started cutting up Katniss’ arm open, then it dawned on you the arm with the tracker, the plan to get Katniss out was set into motion.

You grabbed Katniss arm so that she wouldn’t try to fight it, Johanna smeared blood on Katniss’ throat to make her look like she was dying. ”Stay down” she whispered to Katniss and sat up and threw her axe against Brutus and Enobaria who were on their way. ”Come on” Johanna said to you and you followed her as you ran with careers chasing you.

It was hard to keep up with Johanna in this terrain. You then felt a sudden sharp pain in your side and saw that you had gotten a cut that was now bleeding, you guessed that Enobaria must have thrown a knife. You looked up to see where Johanna had gone but she must not have noticed you slowing down because you couldn’t see her.

You turned around and saw that only Enobaria was on your trail now. You drew your sword just in time to deflect another knife coming your way, she drew her sword as well.

The sound of clashing swords came as she made a slash at you which you blocked. You went back and forward with her for a while slashing, stabbing, cutting but neither managed to kill the other.

Enobaria then made stab at your hand cutting it open so that blood started spilling out, you tried to fight with one hand but she easily disarmed you. You turned around and started running since there wasn’t much else you could do.

You managed to put some fair distance between you and her, not enough to get rid of her but enough so you could draw a knife and throw it at the hand she kept her sword in which caused her to drop it but that didn’t stop her as she drew a knife from her vest.

You did the same bracing yourself for her. The two of you pounced at eachother like tigers, colliding in the air and laying on the ground wrestling for dominance, she had gotten on top of you and tried to stab you but you grabbed the hand she kept her knife in and used your other hand to grab her hair.

You pulled it with all your strength and managed to roll over so that you were on top of her, you held her down and punched her across the face. She still managed to grab you and roll you over so she was on top of you again and she the showed you her fang like teeth.

She was starting to lean down probably about to rip your throat out with her bare teeth but something had distracted her, you seized your moment and noticed you were right beside a steep slope. So with all the power in your body you grabbed a hold of her and threw her off of you and down the slope.

You got up quickly and looked at what had distracted her and saw that it was a blue glowing wire pointing right up into the sky or what used to be the sky but was now just a gray dome.

Your brain put some kind of scenario together that this was part of the plan so you started making you way towards the source of the glowing wire but it was hard you were still bleeding and you were exhausted from your fight with Enobaria.

You staggerd towards the lightning tree but your body couldn’t take anymore and you collapsed, you looked up at the gray dome and saw that it was starting to fall apart. That made you smile and you thought to yourself ”Thank you, Mockingjay” and then it faded to black.

(A/N: Don’t worry you didn’t die at the end, but please give this a like or reblog it took like a lot of time write and i really tried my best, there might be some grammatical errors in there but deal with it)

[tennessoui]

would you ever do a hunger games au? like anakin and obi-wan in the arena and doing a katniss and peeta thing where they both survive? anakin maybe killing the competitors so obi-wan wouldn't have to? (just thinking that child killing is in character for him) anyway no pressure or anything I just haven't stopped thinking about a hunger games au of obikin and. I thought maybe you could do something with it!

i need you to know i shamefully snorted at the child murder thing i'm sorry and i'm also sorry this took so long and it's a bit all over the place and doesn't actually get into the Games at all (+ it's been years since I read the books so all inaccuracies should be tastefully ignored pls) this may not be what you asked for tbh but here you go!!

(content warnings: hunger games typical discussion of child murder, but nothing graphic)

(1.7k)

Anakin’s first emotion after his name is called is a strange sense of relief.

Good, he thinks. I’ll get to go with Obi-Wan. He won’t be alone.

He dutifully steps forward out of the crowd towards the stage, where the announcer is waiting next to Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan who is looking at him with an expression of naked devastation.

Anakin tries to convey that it’ll be alright, that it’s fine, that they knew this was a possibility. Sure, it’s Anakin’s last year eligible to be in the Games. Sure his nineteenth birthday is in two weeks, at which point he would become too old to qualify as a child to the Capitol, but what’s done is done.

Obi-Wan will be his mentor, because Obi-Wan has been the mentor for District Four ever since he won his own Games seven years ago when he was sixteen and Anakin was twelve.

That year’s known unofficially as the most boring Games in Panem history, but the Capitol loves how handsome Obi-Wan’s grown to be. So what if he didn’t kill his competitors messily or with a bloodthirsty joy? He’s so polite in his interviews all these years later, and look at those dimples!

It makes Anakin sick, every time Obi-Wan has to leave District Four and travel to the Capitol to be fawned over and stroked and used. His nightmares are always worse the weeks after he gets back, and he never lets Anakin hold him during them.

And it’s even worse during the actual Games, when Obi-Wan is put in charge of two children’s lives only to see them brutally murdered on screen a week later. The cameras always show his reaction when the competitors from District Four die. They must think he cries pretty or something.

Anakin hates the Capitol. He hates them for what they’ve done to Obi-Wan. What they’ve made him into

As he gets close enough to the stage, he notices that Obi-Wan’s hands are shaking slightly.

He doesn’t even listen to the name of the girl being called. She’s not important. She’ll be dead in a few days time. What’s important is Obi-Wan. What’s important is comforting him, is reassuring him. Is coming back to him.

This is the moment when Anakin resolves that these Games will become known as the quickest in history.

---

The girl is understandably sullen and upset on the train. “I should get a different mentor!” she demands. “It’s obvious you’re going to play favorites with him.”

Anakin doesn’t snap back because she’ll be dead in a few days. Though she really shouldn’t use that tone with Obi-Wan.

“I’m not playing favorites,” Obi-Wan insists. “I don’t have favorites.”

“You literally just wiped sauce off his mouth with your finger,” the girl points out. “And then he licked it!”

Anakin smirks at her. Of course Obi-Wan has favorites. Of course Anakin is Obi-Wan’s favorite. It took him years to wear down Obi-Wan until he allowed him this close, and years after that until he finally got to kiss him for the first time, just a few months ago.

If she thinks he’s going to give up any of his Obi-Wan time so she can get her hopes up about not dying in a few days, she’s got another thing coming.

But Obi-Wan shifts away from him and he looks guilty.

If Anakin could get away with killing the other person from his district, he would. But it’d probably make Obi-Wan sad.

“Is whining part of your strategy?” he asks waspishly instead. “I don’t think it’ll make you many allies.”

She has the nerve to look offended.

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan chides. Underneath the table, he squeezes his knee.

“Everyone in the district knows about you two,” she glares at him. “You haven’t exactly kept it a secret.”

Anakin hasn’t exactly tried to keep it a secret. The first night Obi-Wan had kissed him, he went straight home and told his mother, his neighbor, his schoolmates, his cat, and his ex-girlfriend.

(No one had been surprised, except maybe the cat.)

“It’s not fair,” she cries. “Who can I talk to to get a different mentor for me?”

“The ethics board,” Anakin smiles, all teeth, settling back into his seat and slinging an arm around Obi-Wan’s shoulders.

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan says again, this time more exasperatedly. “Robin, I promise I will be the best mentor you can ask for. It is my wish to see you survive as long as possible in the next few weeks.”

The girl jumps to her feet in outrage. “You can’t even say you want me to win!” she yells. There are tears at the corners of her eyes. If she were a little less annoying, Anakin would feel quite bad for her. Obviously Obi-Wan doesn’t want her to win. Anakin’s right here.

She storms out of the train compartment, her face in her hands. Anakin barely waits for the door to close before he’s slipping into Obi-Wan’s lap and throwing his arms around his neck with a groan. “God, I thought she’d never leave.”

He isn’t pushed away. Obi-Wan must realize they only have a handful of days left to be together before he goes into the arena.

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan says wearily, even as his arms encircle his waist.

Anakin presses a kiss to his nose and then another to his cheek. “It’s alright to have favorites, Obi-Wan,” he murmurs. “And she should know there’s no way she’s winning anything. Don’t waste your time.”

“I will do everything I can to make sure she survives as long as possible,” Obi-Wan repeats. “I don’t think I can survive anything else.”

Obi-Wan’s voice sounds shaky, so Anakin presses their lips together. Best not to talk for awhile.

------

“We should discuss strategy,” Obi-Wan says later that night through frantic kisses. “Sponsors, story, training--”

“I have a strategy,” Anakin murmurs back as he moves further down the bed, rucking up his partner’s shirt. “Win.”

----

“You look absolutely radiant,” Anakin tells the girl in an undertone while they’re in line for their interviews. She turns around to glare at him. The designer for their district has gone for the typical fish designs that people always associate with District Four, and they’ve dressed her up in a shimmering iridescent gown that flares at the ends like a fish’s tail.

Anakin’s own outfit is mostly a fishing net draped over one shoulder and a pair of tight pants. The designer, much to Obi-Wan’s embarrassment and Anakin’s satisfaction, had taken one look at his shirtless chest and decided to dress him in as little clothes as possible.

“Weird braid,” is all she says.

Obi-Wan had done it late last night when both of them had tired each other out and Anakin had curled up on his chest. After his Games, Obi-Wan’s hands like to do something. The repetitive motion of braiding and unbraiding Anakin’s hair soothes his demons.

It’s one of the reasons Anakin’s grown it out to his shoulders, much longer than is practical for his district.

Obi-Wan had gone to unbraid it, and Anakin had stopped him. He wanted to keep it. To wear it into the Games.

“Thank you,” he says generously. “I saw your score. 7’s not too bad.”

She sneers at him. “Did you celebrate your 11 with your boyfriend?”

“Oh sorry,” he winces. “Did you hear us? I’m just so bad at biting my tongue when he does this thing with his.”

She scoffs in disgust and turns back around. “I hope he has to watch you die.”

Anakin glares at her back. He knows he can’t kill her himself. But there has to be a way to hurt her and her chances and still have plausible deniability.

When it’s her turn for an interview, she’s vapid and pretty. She laughs and touches the interviewer’s arm.

“I’ve never spent much time in District Four,” the interviewer says jovially. “But tell me, really. Is everyone there as beautiful as the people you keep sending us? I mean. Obi-Wan Kenobi, ladies and gentlemen, am I right?” The audience laughs and hollers. Anakin hates them all. “And now you, Robin, and Anakin Skywalker. Damn!”

Robin--Anakin needs to stop forgetting her name--giggles high in her throat. “It was a very, very enjoyable train ride up,” she says with a stupid wiggle of her eyebrows. “Just this side of too long.”

The audience loses it.

Anakin loses it.

He can’t believe she’s sitting there publicly suggesting that Anakin shares Obi-Wan with anyone. With her. The nerve.

The camera pans to Obi-Wan in the crowd, who looks shocked, embarrassed, and deeply troubled.

Anakin won’t let this stand. He just hopes Obi-Wan forgives him.

The interviewer greets him excitedly when he walks out, and Anakin gives him a sheepish sort of smile.

“Lady killer Skywalker!” the interviewer says. Anakin laughs along with him. “All the girls back home must have been heartbroken to see you leave.”

“But I’ve heard they love watching me go,” he jokes with a charming smile. If that girl--Robin--can do it, he can do it much better. “There’s really only one person for me though,” he murmurs, letting his smile die.

“Oh?” The interviewer asks, leaning forward with interest.

“But sometimes I wonder if they’re only using me for my body,” he says, casting his eyes down. “I love them. Heart and soul, everything I am. But when I told them, they just laughed.”

This is technically true. The first time Anakin had told Obi-Wan that he was in love with him, the older boy had laughed his confession off, saying he was too young to know what he wanted.

“Oh, to be young and in love,” the interviewer sighs theatrically. “So your plan is to win the Games and then win her heart when you get back home?”

Anakin makes himself look sad. Tragically sad. Like he can’t bear to go on.

“They came with me,” he says.

If the audience’s reaction to Robin’s fake confession was huge, its reaction to Anakin’s words is even bigger. Of course they think he’s talking about the girl. That’s exactly what Anakin had wanted. Now he’s the broken-hearted boy and she’s the vapid, self-absorbed bitch. She'll have a hard time finding sponsors now.

It’s very, very hard to hide his smile, a task made exponentially more hard when he sees Obi-Wan bury his face in his hands.

“It’s alright,” Anakin tells the interviewer, without taking his eyes off of Obi-Wan. “I’ll survive.”

[lemonluvgirl]

Promise Me, Little Brother

In an alternate universe where Peeta doesn’t go into the Hunger Games with Katniss but his middle brother does, Katniss comes home a broken and weary victor in more ways than one. The Mellark family is devastated by their loss, and Peeta Mellark tries to deal with his intense feelings of grief and regret. 

Until one night Haymitch Abernath hands him a letter written by his late brother. A letter that demands Peeta fulfill a promise he made one year ago. The request is simple in theory. All Peeta has to do is work up the courage and actually talk to Katniss Everdeen. But the girl that left District 12 a year ago is not the same girl who came back home. Her nights are filled with horrors of mutts, dead children, and there’s blood on her hands. Including the blood of Peeta’s brother. 

How will the two star-crossed lovers reach each other in this alternate universe where they are separated by loss, guilt, and heartache? 

The only answer seems to be in the folded up letter Peeta carries around in his pocket. The one he can’t stop thinking about. 

Dear Little Brother,

If you’re reading this letter then that means Katniss made it home instead of me. I just want you to know that’s ok. I mean, it kinda sucks for me, but that doesn't matter really at this point. What does matter is that her winning doesn’t have to suck for you. Not for long anyway. You can grieve for a year, and let me go. Be sad if you want, until the next reaping. And if you’re not chosen, then have to stop moping. Because if she’s alive and you’re not going into the Games, then you still have a chance to keep your promise to me. You still have a chance to be happy.

I mean it, Peeta. You deserve to be happy. I know you would never wish for me to die. But shit happens, and sometimes there’s nothing you can do. I know it will hurt. I mean I am your favorite brother after all. The coolest. The smartest. And the best at giving advice on girls and sex. (Don’t listen to any of the shit Rye tells you about girls. It was a miracle or a fluke that he got the girlfriend he has now. And between the three of us, we all know I was always the stud). Sorry I won’t be there to impart more of my vast knowledge of the female species.

But I can give you this last nugget of wisdom. Don’t be a pussy. I’m serious. Just because you’re all sensitive and in touch with your emotions and crap doesn’t mean you can’t go after what you really want. And I know you want Everdeen. You have since before you could tie your shoelaces properly. That’s ok. You’ve always been the one to take after dad the most. But don’t follow in his footsteps. Don’t let your opportunity pass you by. And for the love of God, don’t fucking settle. Especially not to make mom happy. If you want to marry a wild Seam girl and have a dozen brown barefoot babies then just do it man. You deserve the life you want. You probably deserve it more than anyone.

So here, in this last letter that I will ever write I’m holding you accountable. I’m calling you out to be a man, and fulfill your oath. Quit selling yourself short Peet. You’ve got untapped potential to make that girl fall as hard for you as you have for her. You just gotta be brave enough to go for it. I want you to promise me that you’ll just take the fucking plunge already and talk to her. Ask her out, or hell even just be her friend at first if that’s what it takes, (she is kind of scary I’ll admit). But that doesn’t mean you can’t start living your life. Your best life, from now on. Do this for me, little brother. And if after you’ve given it your very best shot, it doesn't work out then you can count your promise fulfilled. But I highly doubt it won’t work out. You’re too nice. And Katniss Everdeen needs more nice things in her sad lonely life. Alright, that’s it. That’s all I want Peeta. And it’s the last thing I’ll ever ask of you. Wait, scratch that. No, I’ll ask you one more thing.

BE HAPPY. I don’t care how you do it, or how long it takes, or even how much happiness you find. Just find a way to do it okay?

Love you and all that crap,

-Lev.

P.S. I would also consider it a personal favor if you could try to get laid before you turn 30. But, I won’t make that a condition. Just take it as something I very strongly advise doing. Okay, now that’s really all I have to say. Bye, baby brother.

Read the rest of the story on AO3. 

[katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Hey ! So I have always hated Peeta trying to sacrifice himself for Katniss in the first book. Cuz he didn't know her , talked to her never , if she were a little more selfish she could just straight off used him in the games ... Like he just signed up to be used ! What if he misjudged her ?? What if she were a horrible person .Do you agree with the love at first song trope ? 1st book Peeta's alibi is a complete mess imo. Perspective please.

(I kinda feel like his elder sister )

Okay look. It's not a popular opinion but *takes a deep breath and braces myself* I agree with you in principle. Look. I used to think I was a hopeless romantic, but I have never bought into the idea that Peeta was so madly in love with Katniss going into the 74th Games that he was willing to die specifically to save her. I don't buy into love at first sight (first song ha! love it), and insta-love is one of my least favorite tropes. My congratulations to those of you who've found and managed to maintain a love at first sight. I am not one of them.

Love has many different forms and definitions, so maybe Peeta did love Katniss in a way before the Games, but as you point out --- he didn't know her. He'd never talked to her. He had a crush on her going into those first Games and maybe loved the IDEA of her, but not Katniss herself.

As for the self-sacrificing nature of Peeta's love... Okay look. Peeta tells us that he wants to die as himself. He wants his death to MEAN something, because in a twisted way, if his death is meaningful, then his life was meaningful. He wasn't just a pawn, a piece in their Games. If his death means something, then he's broken the Capitol's beliefs and treatment of district citizens, albeit in a somewhat quiet fashion, since I don't think Peeta intends to spark rebellion, just like Katniss doesn't. His desire to die a meaningful death is more philosophical than revolutionary in his eyes.

So how does he make his death meaningful? By ensuring someone else lives, in this case, specifically someone who is NEEDED back home. Prim and her mother rely on Katniss, and Peeta appears to have some awareness of this. But there's more than just that. I work in book world primarily, and one of the things the books has in it that the movies cut is the fact that every month for the year after their Games, the home district of the victor receives a train full of gifts from the Capitol -- food, resources, etc. It's part of the reason the Career Districts are so reviled. They keep winning. They keep getting the treats from the Capitol. They're not struggling as much. In fact, Katniss tells us in Catching Fire that the days when the gifts arrive in district 12 are some of the few days when she feels GOOD about winning the Games... why? Because her victory benefited someone else besides herself. A LOT of someone's besides herself.

So, if we apply this to Peeta... whose own mother doesn't think he'll win, (but Katniss might!) then what we get is a boy who understands that even if he doesn't have much of a chance of winning, his district partner does. And if his district partner wins... then his entire district, all of his friends, all of his family, everyone he knows, will benefit from his death for AN ENTIRE YEAR. So no, I don't think he chose to do everything in his power to keep Katniss alive and get her the victor's crown solely as a means of expressing his undying love for her. His crush on her is certainly a complication and added motivation to his plans, but I do not think it was the sole motivating factor.

In fact, he seems surprised and GRATEFUL when she actually comes to find him after the rule change. He understands that she didn't have to do that to keep herself alive. From his perspective, she doesn't need him to win, so why the heck would she burden herself with someone who is sick and probably dying when, if she'd just left him to die in the stream, she could climb a tree and pick the other tributes off one by one now that she's got the bow and arrows. Hence the beginning of Peeta believing that she actually cares for him and the development of their confused relation and affection for one another in the first arena. And from there it just spirals but that's a discussion for another day/ask. ;)

One of the things that I love about this series is the ways in which it examines our extremely complicated and convoluted motivations for our actions and choices. Since we are in Katniss's head we get to see that played out in her thoughts and through her choices, but I personally don't think it's fair to boil Peeta's choices in the first book down to "because he loved Katniss so much." Played a factor? sure. Sole motivation? I don't buy that, but that's just my opinion on the matter, lol. Does this help soothe your indignant older sister feelings?

oh also, I got your prompt. It gave ma a chuckle and I do plan to write it, but I gotta do some research for a paper at some point this weekend, lol.

[katnissmellarkkk]

Hiiii! Here’s part two of my Katniss and Peeta Taking Of Each Other bookcomb! It’s pretty long so … sorry 😬. There was a lot I didn’t include and a lot I wasn’t sure about including, because so much of Catching Fire and Mockingjay is about them wanting to protect the other but I tried to narrow it down to actual acts that were caring, or times they at least tried to care for the other.

-

Then, as if I can’t stand it another second, I start running. He catches me and spins me around and then he slips — he still isn’t entirely in command of his artificial leg — and we fall into the snow, me on top of him, and that’s where we have our first kiss in months. It’s full of fur and snowflakes and lipstick, but underneath all that, I can feel the steadiness that Peeta brings to everything. And I know I’m not alone. As badly as I have hurt him, he won’t expose me in front of the cameras. Won’t condemn me with a halfhearted kiss. He’s still looking out for me. Just as he did in the arena. Somehow the thought makes me want to cry. Instead I pull him to his feet, tuck my glove through the crook of his arm, and merrily pull him on our way.

-

“We’re going!” says Peeta, shoving the Peacekeeper who’s pressing on me. “We get it, all right? Come on, Katniss.” His arm encircles me and guides me back into the Justice Building. The Peacekeepers follow a pace or two behind us.

-

Effie starts giving me pills to sleep, but they don’t work. Not well enough. I drift off only to be roused by nightmares that have increased in number and intensity. Peeta, who spends much of the night roaming the train, hears me screaming as I struggle to break out of the haze of drugs that merely prolong the horrible dreams. He manages to wake me and calm me down. Then he climbs into bed to hold me until I fall back to sleep. After that, I refuse the pills. But every night I let him into my bed. We manage the darkness as we did in the arena, wrapped in each other’s arms, guarding against dangers that can descend at any moment.

-

“He was poaching. What business is it of hers, anyway?” says the man.

“He’s her cousin.” Peeta’s got my other arm now, but gently. “And she’s my fiancée. So if you want to get to him, expect to go through both of us.”

-

When my mother has locked the door behind them, I slump against the table.

“What is it?” says Peeta, holding me steadily.

“Oh, I banged up my left foot. The heel. And my tailbone’s had a bad day, too.” He helps me over to one of the rockers and I lower myself onto the padded cushion.

My mother eases off my boots. “What happened?”

“I slipped and fell,” I say. Four pairs of eyes look at me with disbelief. “On some ice.” But we all know the house must be bugged and it’s not safe to talk openly. Not here, not now.

-

My mother gives me a cup of chamomile tea with a dose of sleep syrup, and my eyelids begin to droop immediately. She wraps my bad foot, and Peeta volunteers to get me to bed. I start out by leaning on his shoulder, but I’m so wobbly he just scoops me up and carries me upstairs. He tucks me in and says good night but I catch his hand and hold him there.

-

Peeta sits on the side of the bed, warming my hand in both of his. “Almost thought you’d changed your mind today. When you were late for dinner.”

I’m foggy but I can guess what he means. With the fence going on and me showing up late and the Peacekeepers waiting, he thought I’d made a run for it, maybe with Gale.

“No, I’d have told you,” I say. I pull his hand up and lean my cheek against the back of it, taking in the faint scent of cinnamon and dill from the breads he must have baked today.

-

Each afternoon he carries me downstairs for a change of scenery and I unnerve everyone by turning on the television.

-

Effie, shining in a wig of metallic gold, lacks her usual verve. She has to claw around the girls’ reaping ball for quite a while to snag the one piece of paper that everyone already knows has my name on it. Then she catches Haymitch’s name. He barely has time to shoot me an unhappy look before Peeta has volunteered to take his place.

-

“Why would he paint a picture of me, Effie?” I ask, somehow annoyed.

“To show he’s going to do everything he can to defend you. That’s what everyone in the Capitol’s expecting, anyway. Didn’t he volunteer to go in with you?” Effie says, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

-

I lock my fingers tightly into his and say, “Watch my feet. Just try to step where I step.” It helps. We seem to move a little faster, but never enough to afford a rest, and the mist continues to lap at our heels.

-

Peeta and Finnick and I position ourselves in a triangle, a few yards apart, our backs to one another. My heart sinks as my fingers draw back my last arrow. Then I remember Peeta has a sheath, too. And he’s not shooting, he’s hacking away with that knife. My own knife is out now, but the monkeys are quicker, can spring in and out so fast you can barely react.

“Peeta!” I shout. “Your arrows!”

Peeta turns to see my predicament and is sliding off his sheath when it happens. A monkey lunges out of a tree for his chest. I have no arrow, no way to shoot. I can hear the thud of Finnick’s trident finding another mark and know his weapon is occupied. Peeta’s knife arm is disabled as he tries to remove the sheath. I throw my knife at the oncoming mutt but the creature somersaults, evading the blade, and stays on its trajectory.

Weaponless, defenseless, I do the only thing I can think of. I run for Peeta, to knock him to the ground, to protect his body with mine, even though I know I won’t make it in time.

-

While I help Peeta coat his skin with the ointment, Finnick deftly cleans the meat from the shellfish.

-

I stretch out, pressing my hot cheek on the grass mat, staring at the thing in aggravation. Peeta rubs a tense spot between my shoulders and I let myself relax a little.

-

I know it’s stopped when I feel Peeta’s hands on me, feel myself lifted from the ground and out of the jungle. But I stay eyes squeezed shut, hands over my ears, muscles too rigid to release. Peeta holds me on his lap, speaking soothing words, rocking me gently. It takes a long time before I begin to relax the iron grip on my body. And when I do, the trembling begins.

“It’s all right, Katniss,” he whispers.

-

“Katniss!” I hear his voice though he’s a far distance away. But what is he doing? Peeta must have figured out that everyone is hunting us by now. “Katniss!”

I can’t protect him. I can’t move fast or far and my shooting abilities are questionable at best. I do the one thing I can to draw the attackers away from him and over to me. “Peeta!” I scream out. “Peeta! I’m here! Peeta!” Yes, I will draw them in, any in my vicinity, away from Peeta and over to me and the lightning tree that will soon be a weapon in and of itself. “I’m here! I’m here!” He won’t make it. Not with that leg in the night. He will never make it in time. “Peeta!”

-

I’m rattled by the turn in the conversation. The implications that I could so readily dispose of Peeta, that I’m in love with Gale, that the whole thing has been an act. My cheeks begin to burn. The very notion that I’m devoting any thought to who I want presented as my lover, given our current circumstances, is demeaning. I let my anger propel me into my greatest demand. “When the war is over, if we’ve won, Peeta will be pardoned.”

-

At the mention of my name, Peeta’s face contorts in effort. “Katniss . . . how do you think this will end? What will be left? No one is safe. Not in the Capitol. Not in the districts. And you . . . in Thirteen . . .” He inhales sharply, as if fighting for air; his eyes look insane. “Dead by morning!”

Off camera, Snow orders, “End it!” Beetee throws the whole thing into chaos by flashing a still shot of me standing in front of the hospital at three-second intervals. But between the images, we are privy to the real-life action being played out on the set. Peeta’s attempt to continue speaking. The camera knocked down to record the white tiled floor. The scuffle of boots. The impact of the blow that’s inseparable from Peeta’s cry of pain.

And his blood as it splatters the tiles.

-

I poke around in the pile, about to settle on some cod chowder, when Peeta holds out a can to me. “Here.” I take it, not knowing what to expect. The label reads LAMB STEW.

I press my lips together at the memories of rain dripping through stones, my inept attempts at flirting, and the aroma of my favorite Capitol dish in the chilly air. So some part of it must still be in his head, too. How happy, how hungry, how close we were when that picnic basket arrived outside our cave.

-

In the fluorescent light, the circles under his eyes look like bruises. “There’s still time. You should sleep.” Unresisting, he lies back down, but just stares at the needle on one of the dials as it twitches from side to side. Slowly, as I would with a wounded animal, my hand stretches out and brushes a wave of hair from his forehead. He freezes at my touch, but doesn’t recoil. So I continue to gently smooth back his hair. It’s the first time I have voluntarily touched him since the last arena.

“You’re still trying to protect me. Real or not real,” he whispers.

“Real,” I answer. It seems to require more explanation. “Because that’s what you and I do. Protect each other.” After a minute or so, he drifts off to sleep.

-

“Katniss!” He whips his head toward me but doesn’t seem to notice my bow, the waiting arrow. “Katniss! Get out of here!”

I hesitate. His voice is alarmed, but not insane. “Why? What’s making that sound?”

“I don’t know. Only that it has to kill you,” says Peeta. “Run! Get out! Go!”

-

It’s a long shot, it’s suicide maybe, but I do the only thing I can think of. I lean in and kiss Peeta full on the mouth. His whole body starts shuddering, but I keep my lips pressed to his until I have to come up for air. My hands slide up his wrists to clasp his. “Don’t let him take you from me.”

Peeta’s panting hard as he fights the nightmares raging in his head. “No. I don’t want to . . .”

I clench his hands to the point of pain. “Stay with me.”

His pupils contract to pinpoints, dilate again rapidly, and then return to something resembling normalcy. “Always,” he murmurs.

I help Peeta up and address Pollux.

-

While Cressida and Pollux make fur nests for each of us, I attend to Peeta’s wrists. Gently rinsing away the blood, putting on an antiseptic, and bandaging them beneath the cuffs.

-

By the time I make it back to the fence, I’m so sick and dizzy, Thom has to give me a ride home in the dead people’s cart. Help me to the sofa in the living room, where I watch the dust motes spin in the thin shafts of afternoon light.

My head snaps around at the hiss, but it takes awhile to believe he’s real. How could he have gotten here? I take in the claw marks from some wild animal, the back paw he holds slightly above the ground, the prominent bones in his face. He’s come on foot, then, all the way from 13. Maybe they kicked him out or maybe he just couldn’t stand it there without her, so he came looking.

[…]

Out of nowhere, the tears begin to pour down my cheeks. “She’s dead.” I clutch my middle to dull the pain. Sink down on my heels, rocking the pillow, crying. “She’s dead, you stupid cat. She’s dead.” A new sound, part crying, part singing, comes out of my body, giving voice to my despair. Buttercup begins to wail as well. No matter what I do, he won’t go. He circles me, just out of reach, as wave after wave of sobs racks my body, until eventually I fall unconscious. But he must understand. He must know that the unthinkable has happened and to survive will require previously unthinkable acts. Because hours later, when I come to in my bed, he’s there in the moonlight. Crouched beside me, yellow eyes alert, guarding me from the night.

-

Peeta, bearing a warm loaf of bread, shows up with Greasy Sae. She makes us breakfast and I feed all my bacon to Buttercup.

-

I wake screaming from nightmares of mutts and lost children. But his arms are there to comfort me. And eventually his lips. On the night I feel that thing again, the hunger that overtook me on the beach, I know this would have happened anyway.

-

Peeta says it will be okay. We have each other. And the book. We can make them understand in a way that will make them braver.

-